Playing dressups

Playing Dressups

The night before, we had argued. We had argued because he had consumed two bottles of red wine and anything else that he could find the dredges of, which would be almost zilch because he always finished everything off. Anyway – I’m not a huge drinker and not during the week to the point where I wouldn’t be able to get up for work. This guy used to drive to work, still drunk, the next day. I often used to find him slumped over his steering wheel, car jacked up half on the curb and lawn or driveway and curb, the lights and radio still blaring. The drivers’ door askew and one leg hanging out. Like it’s the thought that counts…he thought he could get home, get inside the house…ridiculous. So this was why I was mad.

Anyway, as you do, I couldn’t sleep and lay in our bed wondering how the hell did I get here and how the hell I was going to extricate myself from it all. It must’ve been close to 4 am and I hear his car bumble into the driveway and something inside me wished he’d just stay in that car tonight, I was still pissed at the whole uncaring scenario. Alcoholics tend to not give a shit – like just about every other addict addicted to something more important than you.

I can hear him scrabbling around with his keys and I hear him talking nonsense to the cat and rummaging in the fridge. I make sure my back is turned as I just cannot face an argument with an illogical, loud, irrational drunk. He comes into our bedroom. I can hear him undressing and I lie quietly – trying to make my breathing sound even and as if I’m well asleep. He’s struggling to get his pants off and falls around the room, cursing and bumping into things and then collapses onto the bed, snoring.

I pluck feebly at the bed blankets he’s trapping underneath his comatose body. I lie there trying to figure out how I’m going to breathe for the next while, till I have to get up for work, as the room is turning into an alcoholic gas chamber. I only have to wonder about this for an hour and then I will have to get up to open the restaurant for breakfast. I can’t stand it so I get up. I decide to have shower to shake off the sleepless night. We have an en suite and I find my way there in the dark and turn the light on on the inside of the wall. A faint beam streams out, highlighting the bedroom as I turn to close the door behind me. In the moment the light poured itself briefly over my sleeping partner, I noticed something strange. All I could see were maybe two dark lines down his back – up to where the covers hid the rest of his body – from the sort of elbow area down. He’s lying on his stomach and is snoring facing the other way.

I gently open the door a little wider so that more light can try and identify what I am not sure I am seeing. I tentatively take a step back into the bedroom, squinting in the shadowy room. I keep going towards the bed and stand there looking at him. If you had been recording it, it would’ve looked like something out of those spooky paranormal movies. I was trying to figure out what he was wearing. I lean forward and carefully pull the sheets back to expose more of his body.

I didn’t know whether to laugh, cry, scream or punch him. He was wearing a petticoat, with little string straps and a lacy trim. I was like, what the fuck!! I was in shock – I tell you, there is nothing like finding your man dressed up in women’s lingerie to wake you the fuck up out of your grumbling stupor of a morning.

His name just fell loudly out of my face and I was still clutching the tented bedclothes above him. His drunken scrunched up face dug itself deeper in the pillow and an arm came out to grab the blankets back.

“I like it! It’s nothing!” He slurred and promptly fell back into his drunken slumber. Well, I’m sorry, but I have nothing against anyone doing things that are consensual and don’t hurt anyone, but I do want to be the only one in the lingerie!

We spoke about it and he denied, denied, denied. It was crazy – I mean, I saw him! Needless to say as I like my men all man, I left and we have stayed friends. Interestingly enough his next girlfriend contacted me in a very distressed state to say that she thought he was cheating as she had found a suitcase of women’s lingerie, stockings and high heel shoes in the boot of his car when she had borrowed it one day. If only that were the case.

It was strange because after the initial shock and insulted type of feeling I had, I felt sorry for him…I realized that maybe he drank so heavily as he was trying to run away from who he needed to be. It may not be who you want to be, but it will be who you are…

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17 thoughts on “Playing dressups

  1. Oh wow, that’s why there’s a picture of Frankenfurter at the top of the post. If he’d come clean then he would not have had to hide it, maybe take a while to find someone who accepted it but that’s life, funny old world we live in!

    Liked by 1 person

    • That’s right! In all four instances, yes – for the picture, yes, he could’ve come clean and not hide it, yes it is tricky to find someone to accept certain things and yes, what a crazy ol’ world we live in 🙂 It has given me insight, understanding and a story to tell. And with all of that we are still friends years and years later 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • But why wouldn’t you still be friends? You couldn’t take his cross-dressing or drinking but you never said you didn’t feel for him, I enjoy doing things differently, never what’s expected, sometimes I can get away with it but not always.
        Haven’t you tried something that was forbidden? I’m not necessarily talking about illegal just something out of the ordinary? 😃

        Liked by 1 person

      • Hahaha! that’s a lot like I think – and yes, I love giving a totally unexpected response – especially to things people think you may freak out about! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Absolutely! :):( I know it’s not always the right thing to do but I don’t believe the people I love and who care for me should suffer with me if I can prevent it….this is why writing is such a cathartic thing for me – I can vent on paper and I feel better! 🙂 And besides, I have met lovely people like yourself who care about others and want to help in the world, not harm. Blessings to you, my far away friend! 🙂 xoxo hope all is well with you and yours 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • As well as it can be. I hate being weakly paid once a month as there’s always too much month left at the end of the money 😉 that actually sounds better than it looks written down 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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