An Error…

/ Kait King

An Error main-qimg-83d9c63d48f17b36263fcc56f450131c

I was fortunate to have a relationship with my Dad. Back in the day it was not expected for Fathers to have that much to do with the children. That was just the era and error of the day…

Kait King 2017

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16 thoughts on “An Error…”

  4. It feels almost obtrusive to enter this conversation / dialogue. Yet I just want to express the empathy I feel for both of you/ your experiences. Whatever age your Dad, say, dies it is shattering and huge. Mine is critically ill right now / it is so hard but I try to enjoy every day I see him in these days and maximise our contact.

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    • Oh Henry, I’m sorry to hear that…yes, spend the time you can with him. Talk about the good times past, funny holidays etc . My heart goes out to you as you will have to let him go eventually. I told my dad it was ok to go…that we would look after mum and each other. It’s a tough time. Big hugs😔🌻💔

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  5. My dad died when I was in the 3rd grade. I didn’t get to know him as much as I would have loved. Hie guidance would have saved me great hardships. My father-in-law taught me how to be a good father and grandfather. I am grateful for him.

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      • You always will. I lost my dad 5 years ago as a grown woman and that was heartbreaking. He had lived a long life and yet that wasn’t enough for me…so I cant even imagine the years and depth of loss you have suffered without him. I’m just so glad you learned to be a great father and grandfather in spite of your loss. 🙏🌻

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      • Your parents shape you as a potter molds his clay. If the potter is removed, others step in to complete the process. I was blessed with a good mother and wonderful aunts. But, I wonder what shape the finished product would have looked like had the original potter survived. People say children are resilient and I suppose that is true. Is the loss felt more intensely if the death of a parent occurs later in an individual’s life? One wonders….

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      • Personally I don’t think it’s about time, but the feeling of loss. Some people have never met a parent due to death before birth or during birth, but that doesn’t stop the feeling of loss. Wanting to cry every time someone mentions a mum or dad that you’ve never met. When others curse their parents or bitch and moan about how tough it is having parents that have rules because they care, when all you want is to be grounded, even once, by someone you love but never met, have vague memories of, or can’t remember. Seeing the sad look in people’s eyes when they look at you because they know you’re missing out…I only know these things because my mum lost her mum when she was ten, and I had a partner whose wife died giving birth, leaving him with a little girl that looked and acted just like her mother, without her mother even there. So yes, for me, I believe time is irrelevant, a stillbirth is still birth but with no life and it’s the dreams and hope of love, joy, family etc that is crushing and breaks you when you are left with empty arms and a hole in your heart that nothing can fill. I don’t know if this is true but it’s how I’ve looked at loss as I’ve moved through my life and its joys and heartbreaks! It is a curious question though. I’m sure many will have other answers too🙂🙏

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