Time
leapt away
from me…
It left me
behind,
behind some
enemy line…
Time
jumped
like a rabbit
down a dark hole…
skittishly aware
of the scar
on my Soul
© Kait King, 2016
Poetry
Geminaic Dilemma – another conversation with a Gemini
It’s 22 past 2
What am I here for?
And can’t I leave?
But do you really want to?
I have to go
Are you clear in the sight of all things?
I see nothing
I feel him
I need to –
No
I have to go!
I don’t want to be deserted
Well I want to be the deserter –
It won’t hurt so much
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
Crime of Passion
I wonder what my reaction
would be
if I came home and had
to see
you with someone that was
not me?
Would I stay or
would I flee?
The four stages
of shock
when you find someone else
locked
on the end of your man’s
cock
and you need a loaded
Glock
So do you stand quietly
by the door
do you want to
watch some more
or
do you want to scream at her
she’s a whore
or collapse on
the floor or
walk out?
Do you do it all
real calmly
like you don’t really
want it to be
“Would you like a cup of tea?”
“Would you please explain to me?”(tearfully)
That would be nice
but it’s not me
This is more
my reality
“I’m gonna kill the both of you for free!”
“How could you do this to me?” (insanely)
But a gun wouldn’t leave me
in doubt…
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
It gets murky…
It’s not that I’ve forgotten you, sweet angel of mine, it’s that I just lost myself for a little while. You’ve been there so strong and true. Your arms swallow me safely and I’m grateful, so grateful for you. I couldn’t even see your pain because I couldn’t see through mine – the deep dark cloud of despair. I know it’s not forever, but at the moment, a day is a lifetime
For Jay, my nine year old son (at the time) who had to live with me being there, but not there, for nearly five years. I remember just about nothing of that period of time due to the heavy medication I was on. In the photo above he’s twenty 🙂
Pass it forward:
Scribble Me
Scribble me
into your life
Pen me
into your mind
Feel me
in tactile braille
So I can read you
if I’m blind
Then, touch me with
a purity – like
a crisp white paper sheet
Write me
into a love story
Our blending ink –
A story complete
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
Sparrow Babies
Tiny and Tinier 2014
A cove
a sparrow’s trove
of palely speckled eggs
a fluff of feathers
incompetent wings
and skinny wobbly legs
A dangerous night
or maybe it’s two
you spend upon the ground
all alone
but then the sun comes up
and warms your spirit
and you fly yourself off home
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Pick me
Please don’t pick me
not again
I’m terrified
so frightened I can’t
breathe
It hurts and I can’t
see
through the tears
I don’t know
I’m crying
Universe,
Please stop me
now
before it’s too late
and time
steals you away
from me
too brief
too painful
this I can’t do
Please,
Please Universe
don’t pick me
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
When you let me in
When we are
touching skin
when you have
let me in
With a dream-like
essence
I feel your
presence
the heat from
your skin
when you let me in
I know there
are no lies
I can see it
in your blue eyes
I can feel it
from your mouth
I can hear it in
your blazing skin
when you let me in
the goose bumps on
your flesh
and our kiss
can only express
we are so lost
it must be a sin
but only when
you let me in
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Just to Be
Just to be painless
I need to
be numb
Just to be painless
I must be
made dumb
I can’t connect
but just lie
in a bed
Life laughs
at my bet
Just to be painless
I can’t be me
Just to be painless
I can’t be free
Just to be painless
and live a life
I wanted to live
The purpose
that would give
Just to be painless…
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
The Master
I’m not the hero
I used to be
but I’ve mastered
the art of
Insanity
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Suicide – is it really a free ticket out?
With a delicate stillness
and a quiet noise
with porcelain perfection
and perfect China poise
the body is supine
lying dead on the floor
supine in exsanguination
a choice to become Death’s whore
Ruby red your favourite colour
you wear it very well
although I won’t see you out much
a story we will tell
Did you get off scot-free?
Did you truly escape?
Or will you have to pay your dues
and return to this landscape…
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Sweet Sugar Spike!
I am a chocolate addict
call me what you will
Mouth open wide
Chocolate pouring in
that’s how I’d get
my thrill
I am a sugar junkie
call it how you want
I order a starter to have
dessert
at the restaurant
Sweet tooth, sweet freak
call it what you like
but nothing makes me happier
than my sweet sugar
spike!
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
At Lunch Today

At lunch today
I fell a little more
in love with you
Your smile grazes the
inside of my heart with
such passion
At lunch today
your blue eyes brighter
for seeing me
Sparkling over
sparkling water
with just a hint
of lemon
that cannot sour
our chemistry
At lunch today
while I watched you
talk
I followed your lips
watched your mouth
heard nothing
and thought just
about kissing
I love having
Lunch with you
© Kait King, 2017
Pass it forward:
A Seeker
I don’t want to be here
I don’t want to be here alone
I don’t want to be here alone
in my empty zone
I want to love
I want to love again
I want to love again and be free of all this pain
I can’t do it
I can’t just let it go
I can’t just let it go and
pretend I didn’t know
My soul aches
My soul and my heart ache badly
They ache for man’s cruel inhumanity
I’m a seeker
I’m a seeker of love,
peace, and harmony
I’m a seeker –
please tell me
you’ll follow me
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
And you’re still here …
You look at me
with such
tranquility
I believe perfection
sits here with us
I look at you
with such
admiration
to have entertained me enough
to still sit here
with me
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
A Lovers’ Note
Hi babe
There you are lying –
fast asleep
You are softly snoring
and my heart still
misses a beat
As the love in me
is so great
there is nothing I need
to contemplate
This is how you are to me
in all your vulnerability
but you will always be safe with me
if you can love – it will set you free
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
The Unknown

And confusion rages
like a winter storm
pushing through my
veins and there’s nothing
I can think
Although there is plenty
I could do
But the storm is
blinding and vicious
And I’m thinking of
my life
Like between a rock
and a hard place
And no, I’m not trapped
I’m not unhappy…
with right now
As the ever-bleeding
heart I’m eased
into the terror of
the unknown
It’s not a bad dream
If it was I wouldn’t know if
I really want to wake up –
Does this just mean for me
that it’s time to face reality?
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
Mother’s Day every day
I walk down the aisle
my eyes passing over cards
words springing out
about Mum going
the whole nine yards
And I stop to read a few
The words just seem
insipid
when I think of you,
Mum
A journey into the intrepid
Four babies later
and over 60 years married
Through wars, tonsillitis,
tears and love you tarried
Now, here I am
a mother too
And these words I say: “I love you”
Have also come
from my son’s mouth
and heart
But to say them to you
doesn’t even begin to start
to express what a fantastic Mum you’ve been
You’ve done a good job,
I’m a good human being
So I tell you you’re an amazing Mum
and people are proud
of the job you’ve done!
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Daily grind of a good guy
I come home
the cat’s at my feet
kids are crying
but there’s nothing made to eat
It’s a hard day at work
with paper knee deep
and the heater’s broken
so I can’t get to sleep
Yet another day comes
we follow like sheep
I can’t find the faith
to make that big leap
I know I shouldn’t take it in
so very, very deep
But it seems to be sort of extra hard
when you aren’t someone who cheats
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Crush
You crush me
Yes, you’re bigger
than me
You’d have to be blind
not to see
that you’re twice the size
of me
But I’m getting tired of
being pushed around
I hate the way you always
bring me down
Slutting yourself all over
this town
And I lie here
so crushed – so deep
underground
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
But…
But…
I let you in
Nobody
gets in
You’re supposed to stay
not walk away
I shared
everything –
gave you my all
you were supposed to love me
not push me
and watch
me fall
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
Thought # 1
If you’re very rarely or never told “No” or don’t have to wait or work for anything, will it be a harder struggle to get on in the World? (This is based on most normal and reasonable of situations – single or separate parenting included and of course, on a continuum).
In the “Real World” no one else treats you the same way as your parents do. No one else cares the same way for you as your parents do. No one else in the World will give you the same leeway. Will one lack a certain resilience because one can’t deal with a No, or don’t understand why it’s a No?
Your Ego takes a beating, hearing all those ‘yeses’ and how wonderful you are at everything and then a No would just take the wind right out of your sails, it’s a shock. Is it about that resilience? Even against adversity and with all the curve balls life throws you, wouldn’t it be better to be able to face that adversity? I am not talking about being a nagging No Hound about everything – but I do think we need to prepare our children for “out there”! Just tell them the truth, make them stand for something, let them know what their strengths and weaknesses are and let them embrace them all and use them to their best advantage in this crazy Life.
If it is about resilience then we must give our children that strength and fight. They need these things to be able to survive – and not just survive but to live well.
Kait King 2017
Pass it forward:
Whoever you are
I just want you to know
that you are not alone
I know it sounds empty –
we can’t talk
I can’t hug you
I can’t invite you into my home
But I need you to know
that there is someone out there
someone who also feels the same
is sick of the same game
and shares the same fears
If I can make you understand
this is not what defines you
but the choices you make
from this day forward
even when you don’t know
what to do
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Dark Man
What cruel god
sent you to me
dark hair
dark eyes
dark soul
What fallen angel
turned on me
bitter anger
bitter words
bitter mind
What desperado
begged to be
the embittered mind
and darkened soul
in me
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
It’s Just Life
I am lying
on my bed
it’s too hot
and the TV’s
too loud
Yet the noisiest
thing
is you
in my head
I can hear
the washing machine
beeping and
beeping endlessly
WTF is wrong
with those things?!
I know I should
eat something
but
I truly can’t be
bothered
it’s just
food
it’s just
money
it’s just
love
it’s just
life…
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
knuckle-bite-fright

warped, crippled
twisted and blackened
my monsters will be set free
decrepit, decayed,
barren of soul
sit here or there
and all will see
Damaged, Dangerous,
Dark and Fright
my monsters travel day or night
bad dreams,
bad thoughts,
dark dreams,
No light –
not all is as it seems
with knuckle-bite fright….
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
whoopdeefrickendoo
So it’s another day – whoopdeefrickendoo
Another uncharted territory I have to see myself through
crap…
no map
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
The first time
The first time
it wasn’t that much
fun
before I got
my panties off
he was already
done…
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Are You OK?
No, I’m not OK
she said
And I didn’t know
what to do
But all she really needed
was someone to
talk to
Not everything is
fixable
or even wants to
be fixed, so
we learn to live with
special things
sometimes things we would
never show
some things are just too ugly
to let anybody know
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
This Buzzy Little Feeling

There’s this buzzy
little feeling –
right in the center of me
And although my body is weighted
something in there
has zero gravity
Is that my Troubled Spirit
or could it be my Lonely Soul?
If I caste this bodily feeling
is it my Spirit that makes me
Whole?
© Kait King, 2016
Pass it forward:
A present for a poo – for doggie lovers
It doesn’t matter what you do
chew up my panties
leave a present that’s a poo
bury personal items
dig a deeper hole
drag cow dung inside
pee on the stripper pole
rip up the newspaper
before it’s even read
take up most of the room
in my double bed
chew a cavern in the chair
bark at things that are not there
but I’d like to make it very clear –
There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you
even though I’m only worth a poo
I really, really do love you 🙂
(Just to make things clear, I’m talking about a dog, not my man!)
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Rock Bottom
I hit rock bottom
I sat on that bottom rock
weeds and roots
tethered me close
and not in a Lovers’ Lock
Catatonic in my despair
broken like a car crash victim
I clutched at straws
and sucked in air
feeling like I needed
Lithium
Overwhelmed by what
I’m not
broken by what I was
fighting what it has to be
a fallen star, a lost cause,
tell it as it is
that old me
will never leave
it’s a part of what makes me
my body may have
let me down
but when I write ,
I’m free
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
No Way
There’s just no stopping
a speeding bullet
straight to the heart
With no clanking armour
or a bullet-proof vest
so it rips you apart
There’s just no way
to make it unscathed
through the day
with no love and no hope
no string to cling to
No reason to stay
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Summer Daze
I feel
the sunshine
on my face
through emerald
branches
like delicate
spider-web lace
I feel
the warm
and soothing rays
of those dreamy
summer days
I wish I could
go back
to that place….
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Gasping for Air
Love flutters
like a drowning butterfly,
swallowed up
whole –
Struggling to keep my
head above the
ripples of your heart
Yet still wanting to be
hopelessly – no,
recklessly
flung into those depths
drowning…
drowning…
Kait King
Pass it forward:
Lucky

Every second we suck in air, a child is hurt or dying somewhere in the world – that makes air a pretty high commodity and a very expensive way to look at breathing our air. Therefore make it worthwhile, make it count, but make it count in love and kindness, caring and passing on joy – not just to children but to all. Breathe your air with purpose, you’re really lucky, every day is a blessing 🙂 Kait King 2016
Pass it forward:
Lovers lock
Lovers locked
in this bittersweet
ride
Trapped in the momentum
a beat of the heart
Skipping through hope
not a care in the
world
Lovers locked close
just a boy
and a girl
© Kait King, 2015
Pass it forward:
Another song for Jay

There’s a part of me
that will always go on
I’ve shared this with our Mother Earth
She called him my son
There’s nothing so wild
as the ride that we’re on
mother and child
a bond
we hold on
And there you were
with paintbrush eyelashes
A baby blue blanket
and everything about you was so small
And here you are
with a shy tattoo on you
An eye, ear, lip piercing
And everything about you now is tall
There’s all of you
that makes me smile
When you hug me so big and
hang around for a while
There’s you and me and then
everybody else
I never knew that it would be you
to teach me about myself
© Kait King, 2015
I love you Jay 🙂 xxx
Pass it forward:
That’s What I’m After
It’s your eyes
It’s your mouth
It’s your smile
your heart
your laughter
But it’s my heart
my fear
It’s my love
my hope
That’s what I’m after
Kait King 2017
Pass it forward:
I need one of those dogs
Listening quietly
in the dawn
of the day
My mind
playing games
that my heart
won’t play
Watching us still
in the dark
of my mind
waiting for someone
I can’t seem to find
Holding this close
Not wanting to lose
Making the choice
and then having
to choose
As the falling rain
dampens my heart
I can’t seem to see,
Was I blind
from the start?
© Kait King, 2015
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