Mum says
they’re just jealous!
But it doesn’t
stop them
from treating me
like dirt
The teachers say
just stay away
which is easy
if I was invisible
or didn’t mind
getting hurt
© Kait King, 2015
Mum says
they’re just jealous!
But it doesn’t
stop them
from treating me
like dirt
The teachers say
just stay away
which is easy
if I was invisible
or didn’t mind
getting hurt
© Kait King, 2015
Mary Bell
what the hell
at ten
was inside your head?
To choke a
little boy of 3
until he’s stone
cold dead
And then to carve
your name in him
the initials MB
in his chest
Did you want everyone
to know
that this work
was your best?
I know your mother
was a prostitute
and she did terrible
things to you
And is she the one
responsible
for making you
into you?
Others have
an even sadder tale
and are left with
deep scars too
but others haven’t
needed to kill
or do the things
you do.
© Kait King, 2015
You crush me
Yes, you’re bigger than me
You’d have to be blind not to see
that you’re twice the size of me
But I’m getting tired of being pushed around
I hate the way you always bring me down
Slutting yourself all over this town
And I lie here so crushed – so deep underground
© Kait King, 2016
He rolled her up
in the carpet
He tied her up
real tight
He threw her into
the trunk of
his car
And screeched out
into the night
He knows he must not
draw attention
He must slow down his breath
and calm
He drove around
for hours
With her body
in the back of
his car
Delusional or clear
of mind
It really didn’t
matter
He was clear enough
to clean up
the mess
And removed
all of her blood
he splattered
He contemplated water
He thought about the dump
He thought about a mountain top
He could make it look like
she jumped
As dawn approached,
a screaming light
His stomach started
to rumble
So he drove her through
the drive thru
And didn’t miss a beat
or fumble
A steady hand
held out dollar bills
But his eyes he kept downcast
Not a thought spared for
his wife in the trunk
The love that didn’t last
© Kait King, 2015
I have a notion
that your emotion
is not just a session
of dark depression
but a mark on your heart
like a bite from a shark
missing pieces never found
and this is why you’ve gone to ground
I can guess
you don’t see this as a test
but an evil calculation
to distract you from your destination
A calculated move
to jig you outta your groove
But the world is not against you
just try on the other shoe
it’s not that hard to do
and if you walk a decent mile
you might cry but you might smile
ain’t it worth it in the end
if you find you’re your best friend
So don’t knock yourself so hard
you’re not stupid or a retard
We are all given different gifts
And as we live our outlook shifts
from continental rifts
to continental drifts
we figure it’s not just about ourselves
that there are no Christmas elves
and that you need to really care
for everything
if you want to get along here
© Kait King, 2015
Would it not be reasonable to think that an individual who ‘requires’ a restraining order, is the type of individual who would break a restraining order?
Kait King 2017
It’s time for me to close my eyes
the sleep – she calls me in
tempting me with promises
of dreams from deep within
Happy to drown in fluid darkness
my lungs relaxed and full
spiralling soft, my body jumps
but still I feel the pull
And so I slumber deep and long
my dreams are all but lost
as I pull myself up from this sleep
to be chilled by morning’s frost
My bed, it lies like a crumpled body
it’s death, by noose, my sheets
I pull on my jeans, headphones on
and head into the streets
The bus stop frozen from icy glares
the wind a second best
We glide and jerk through glistening streets
I know I’m not a guest
My homework lies upon my lap
I want to turn around and go back home
Even my music has lost it’s colour
and bleeds into a drone
We fall out of the bus in an untidy crowd
the Subway reeks of cheese
I feel broken and somewhat heavy
Would they notice if I fell on my knees
My iPod turns into my lecturer
and continues in a monotonous tone
My brain has surpassed this walled in campus
I fall back into my cool dream zone
My liveliness is so inspired by friends of sweet love and sweet dreams
this shining light of laughing free
and left splitting at the seams
We say adiós and walk away
our paths cross again tomorrow
I find myself doubting myself
is this the path that I should follow?
I stand in the queue, the bus pulls up
we file in like a production line
stamped and paid and sit if you’re lucky
the sun’s shining and every thing’s fine
I walk briskly home, it’s getting dark
I walk in tune with a song
And wonder at ideologies like…
why can’t we all get along?
It’s warmer inside and my little friend
turns himself inside out to see me
I talk, I eat, I study hard just to go back
to be soft, warm and dreamy
© Kait King, 2015
I’m uncomfortably present
awkwardly I’m here
Cleverly you’ve trapped me
by playing on my fear
I don’t want to say yes
but something in me is sparked
and if I don’t say yes
I won’t have a heart
you’ll say to me
You’ll say to me
I don’t really love you
that I’m not really into it
and my love is not true
And yet that twist inside me
coils like a snake
ready to make me feel bad
making me ready to hate
myself
© Kait King, 2015
With some leftover tea
I chuck some painkillers at me
A certain kind of guilt and
a definitive disgust wash over me
I fight every day
to keep a smile on my face
being strong, overcome
I have a new life to embrace
I know this is not what
I signed up for
I’ve paid the full price
for so much more
But I guess some you win
and some you lose
So I experience my life
in a different pair of shoes
But I’m still so sure
I was destined for so much more
so much more
I’ve already paid for
© Kait King, 2015
Meet me in the middle
and I’ll take you to the end
Tell me that you trust me
and I’ll let you be my friend
Promise me the world
and it’ll fall at your feet
Run the faster race
’cause it’s me you have to beat
Don’t believe in rumours
and they won’t control your life
Believe in what you want to be
and step into that light
© Kait King, 2015
It doesn’t matter
if you wrote it
in a letter
caught a plane to
come and get her
Think you really
could do better
Sorry for the day man,
that you met her
she took your money
coz you let her
now that time is just
a blur together
and you look like
you’ve been through
the shredder
© Kait King, 2015
Ted Bundy
Our monsters don’t look
like monsters
There is no way to tell
If they’ll share a slice of Heaven
or bring the hate of Hell
They don’t all have dangerous killer looks
they are not all uneducated and despise books
Look at Ted, a prime example
of a learned man who was extremely harmful
Ted Bundy, yes
he was an educated man
but not smart enough
to avoid the hang man
Then there’s really insane
Like Mr Ed Gein
who danced in the moonlight with his mother’s skin on his face
© Kait King, 2015
Jay and George
Beauty Boundless
child of mine
with hopeful heart
and fascinated mind
Beauty Boundless
land of mine
filled with color
seen by the blind
Beauty Boundless
spirit of mine
where love will rest
till the end of time
© Kait King, 2015
Ashes to ashes
dust to dust
Love won’t last forever
anchored only in lust
Kisses for kisses
I forgive you your past
it’s the only way through
If you want us to last
© Kait King, 2015
What’s the difference
when it’s all the same
we go down this road
and come back again
Forgiven you, I haven’t
when it’s caused me
all this pain
and if you try to find me
I’ll fall back into you
again
© Kait King, 2015
I so wish
I could have
been a better mum
But he still loves me
anyway
I see the photo
next to me
Colors blue and grey
you and I
Not much to spend
but time
and he still loves me
anyway
I feel I may have
failed you in
too many ways
to count
In spite of that
you are a beautiful
soul
and you still love me,
anyway
Kait King 16/7/2018
I cry
I cry and I cry
for what I am not
What I am perceived as
is not what they got
I grieve
I break and bend
for what has a future
that already knows the end?
© Kait King, 2015