The Hysteraunt

the Hystaurant 1

There’s anarchy

in the galley

In the kitchen

there’s uproar

The patrons have

ordered something but

there isn’t any more

The tantrumic Chefs

wave teatowels in despair

throw their knives around

and their hands in the air

The one who’s ordered

the supplies

takes a New York stripping down

The Head Chef shouts and

screams a little

wearing his foreign frown

Wildly gesturing – his anger

festering and then

things seem to calm down

Kait King 2015

Summer Sunb0dies

summersunbodies

I can hear the cicadas

with their sliding

grinding legs

laughing kids

melting ice-creams

Clothes freshly dried

on a line

neatly pegged

That sun shine

warm tar

summer rain smell

That open-roofed car

chasing oceanic swells

Those exotic looking palms

lining Rodeo-type roads

giggling girls

in bikinis and curls

with their Summer Sunbodies

on show

© Kait King, 2015

The Unwanted

the unwanted

With a new non-smoker righteousness

you glare at all of me

I’m vulnerable, I’m open

Don’t you want to hold all of me?

Will you curse the shape of my body

or my heart

my spirit

my dream or

perhaps just all of me

Your love that I

need so desperately

makes you dislike me

immediately

I am but a child

I didn’t ask to be born

But please, can you not hug me,

feed me –

keep me warm?

© Kait King, 2015

But I’ve already paid!

Already paid

With some leftover tea

I chuck some painkillers at me

A certain kind of guilt and

a definitive disgust wash over me

I fight every day

to keep a smile on my face

being strong, overcome

I have a new life to embrace

I know this is not what

I signed up for

I’ve paid the full price

for so much more

But I guess some you win

and some you lose

So I experience my life

in a different pair of shoes

But I’m still so sure

I was destined for so much more

so much more

I’ve already paid for

© Kait King, 2015

You’ll say to me

I’m uncomfortably present
awkwardly, I’m here
Cleverly, you’ve trapped me
by playing on my fear
I don’t want to say yes
but something in me is sparked
and if I don’t say yes
I won’t have a heart,
you’ll say to me….

You’ll say to me
I don’t really love you
that I’m not really into it
and my love is not true….
And yet that twist inside me
coils like a snake
ready to make me feel bad
making me ready to hate…..
myself

© Kait King, 2015

When I Write

when i write

When I write

every word is like

a finely crafted feather

particles of a winged voice

To uplift imagination

poor soothe upon torment

A flight path

mind’s destination to dream

picture perfect characters

who they are

where they belong

where you fit in

Nestled tight

keep out cold

turn against the winds of ice

water falling crashing calling

the feather nestled tight

let your imagination take flight

with these words I write

© Kait King, 2015

When you let me in

beautiful-immortal-vampires-eternal-lovers

When we are

touching skin

when you have

let me in

With a dream-like

essence

I feel your

presence

the heat from

your skin

when you let me in

I know there

are no lies

I can see it

in your blue eyes

I can feel it

from your mouth

I can hear it in

your blazing skin

when you let me in

the goose bumps on

your flesh

and our kiss

can only express

we are so lost

it must be a sin

but only when

you let me in

© Kait King, 2015

The Most Important Thing

THe most important thing racoon

She married him

when she was 23

and he was 37

She thought she’d met

Prince Charming

and he thought he’d gone

to Heaven

It didn’t take long tho’

for him to change

his song

And feel like he

was imprisoned

It happened so fast,

turned life on its arse –

she fell undeniably

and beautifully pregnant

She had her baby alone

while he drank and whored

in their home

No, it hadn’t been long

he was just bored

and it was just wrong

He had already been here

twice in his life

He had other children

and more than one wife

So with dignity

and as a lady

she took nothing

with her

just her baby

She didn’t want half

of the furniture

or a share of

the bling

She knew

she had kept

the most important thing

© Kait King, 2015

A Tortured Soul

Tortured soul

I know I’ve never loved

anyone, anywhere

in any way even

close to the way

I love you

I’ve never hurt

anyone, anywhere

in any way

more than I’ve tortured

myself

about you

© Kait King, 2015

The Outsider

Filling in spaces
in the game
of my Life
The map of my body
a giver of Life
Changing my places
the marker beyond
And the trouble
with you dear,
is you don’t belong

© Kait King, 2015

Lovesick

I know
what’s happening
to me
He’s found
his way
in
making me think
in love story
lines
making butterflies
deep inside
me
and a sickness
I cannot recover
from

© Kait King, 2015

Last thought in a Playground

She’s beating the

crap out of me

I want to be

retaliatory

But I can’t find a gap

to even try

and hit back

She kicks me in

my side

Everyone wants to see

me cry

I can hear their

jeering calls

of magnified echoes

charging through halls

This strange metamorphosis

in sound

is my ticket off

the gravelly ground

And I can see myself

lying there

The group of bystanders

shout and cheer

My body, I see

crumpled like

a sack

And I never even got a chance

to throw a punch back

© Kait King, 2015

For the Love of Rastus – R.I.P 20th May 2016

A bright orange glow
you sit in the hedgerow
thinking you are hidden
and will get to catch the forbidden
but little do you know
your gingerness does show
even though you’re so still sitting
your camouflage seems to be what’s missing
You see the birds and can contain the frolics
but I’m sorry Rastas –
You stand out like dog’s bollocks!
You must wonder how come you don’t catch a bird
they must look at you and think you’re absurd
You’ll never catch them in your bright orange coat
Or feel their silky feathers in the back of your throat
I’ve seen the odd field mouse stiff on the bricks
but I just know, that’s not how you want your kicks
A crispy crunchy sparrow or a larger tasty minor
or perhaps a tender inside bird, something a little finer…

© Kait King, 2015

Sleep Deep if you Dare

Sleep deep
Sleep light
Lucky you
if you
sleep tight
Sleep long
Deep sleep
Eyes closed
yet you
still weep
Eyes open
Brain awake
Each breath breathed
a life
at stake
Eyes closed
Brain aches
It seems
like an hour
each second takes
Tweaked bedclothes
Twisting dreams
When are you awake?
Never, it seems
© Kait King, 2015

Junkie Corner and Gangster Avenue

Who’s hanging where

and why are they hanging here?

Are they sucking up the light?

Or just too noisy in the night?

Have the neighbors had enough

Are the gangs a tad too tough?

Do they scare you with their masks

and their everyday drug tasks?

Standing on a corner street

a clusterfuck of hopeless

listening to some grind beat

you just need to smoke, pop, toke this

there is no other option

but for crap minimum wage

Nothing there that stops them

And lucky to reach old age

© Kait King, 2015

Now ThAt’S Crazy-

Ted Bundy

Ted Bundy

Our monsters don’t look

like monsters

There is no way to tell

If they’ll share a slice of Heaven

or bring the hate of Hell

They don’t all have dangerous killer looks

they are not all uneducated and despise books

Look at Ted, a prime example

of a learned man who was extremely harmful

Ted Bundy, yes

he was an educated man

but not smart enough

to avoid the hang man

Then there’s really insane

Like Mr Ed Gein

who danced in the moonlight with his mother’s skin on his face

© Kait King, 2015

Enhancing you

missingpuzzleperson1

I see

the lonely landscape

of an empty soul

Someone incomplete

Someone who’s not whole

It doesn’t take another person

to make you feel as one

You must just believe in yourself

and something to enhance you

will come

© Kait King, 2015

The Hidden Object Blame

Is there really a light
at the end of some tunnel?
Have I lost the map
Did I throw it away
dirty and crumpled?
Have I lost my way
taken a wrong turn
can’t see the light
from the candles burned?
Is it that I’m blind
even though I enjoy vision
For looking I can’t see
and so much
remains hidden

© Kait King, 2015

What’s wrong with you

mary bell

Mary Bell

what the hell

at ten

was inside your head?

To choke a

little boy of 3

until he’s stone

cold dead

And then to carve

your name in him

the initials MB

in his chest

Did you want everyone

to know

that this work

was your best?

I know your mother

was a prostitute

and she did terrible

things to you

And is she the one

responsible

for making you

into you?

Others have

an even sadder tale

and are left with

deep scars too

but others haven’t

needed to kill

or do the things

you do.

© Kait King, 2015

Equal but Different – Let’s Celebrate!

I believe we are stumbling blindly into an inferno of uncontrolled hedonistic violence and sex. There is no argument that sex and violence are two of the most basic instincts in a human, particularly a male as he is the protector and the pro-creator; or that these two basic reptilian responses have been a part of human nature since the beginning of time.
What I find concerning is the lack of the repulsion response to violence or unnatural/violent sex. Research indicates that women, or young girls, are not only joining gangs and becoming more violent in their everyday life, but also committing suicide in more violent ways. If we look back in time, women are the carers, the nurturers, the collectors, and gatherers. Women were seen as mysterious as they bled and didn’t die and could give birth to another human being. An amazing, necessary, and painful responsibility, but one that sets us apart as women and the carers of the next generation. I think we have lost track of that view. Is it because of Women’s Liberation? I don’t think it is because of that, but perhaps a catalyst after so many years of denial and oppression for women that they just went crazy and like most things they snowball into something unmanageable or inexplicable. Women needed to create their own freedom, this was a necessary journey but now we need another hero to pull us back to reality, balance and a normality.
So back to the violence factor. Women used to gas themselves or take pills to commit suicide. Men were the ones who used guns and ropes to do the same. Back in the 1970’s more and more suicides committed by women were found to be with razors, they would slit their wrists. Then they started shooting themselves and hanging too. Women were deemed to see suicide as a way of going to sleep and to look as “peaceful” as possible. They didn’t want their faces blown apart or a mess everywhere – that typical female response seems to be fading as we move forward, women seem to want to be seen as violent, angry, retaliatory and don’t fuck with me individuals. As tough as a man, as strong as, capable as etc. And there is no reason we can’t be. We are all on different levels of ability – what we shouldn’t be doing is denying that ability. We should celebrate our individuality, our gender responsibilities, our strong points – no matter what. But it doesn’t mean we aren’t equal in the ability to be human – we just have different EQUAL roles in the responsibility of the Universe, our lives, our people, children, plants and animals – all Earthlings have a reason to be here. All Earthlings have a role in the world, some of us know this role and others of us struggle to find our purpose. But what our purpose is not, is to degrade, belittle, or detract others from their journey.
I’ve watched Jack Ass and I wonder what influence that may have had on today’s young kids. When we were growing up, if we saw someone (young or old) fall over or hurt themselves or if they failed at something like a driver’s licence or baking a cake – we didn’t laugh and point at them and shout “Loser”. We sat down with them, put an arm around their shoulders, and told them that they would be all right and be able to do this again. We would help them, pick them up, dust them off, and push them forward again, not nail spikes of spite into their very soul to keep them pinned to the lowest low.
So I wonder what has happened to us all. I look rather sadly around me when I see more and more women with guns standing next to a Giraffe, Elephant, or Lion they “hunted” with an AK47, and I’m ashamed. Children and babies burnt, tortured,starved, ignored, and suffering, our elderly abused and forgotten to rot in unacceptable conditions, animals tortured and used for sick individual’s pleasure. But most disturbing of all is that it is a woman at the end of those appalling acts, more and more.
So I beg of us all as women to take back what is ours, our mystery, our caring, our nurturing and saving of the world. We are women. Our power lies in our ability to calm, talk, bring peace, negotiate, and love. Please help me bring our job-description back into the light, it’s who we are, it’s what we were made to do – I don’t want to fall into the hole of what everyone else is doing or hardening up for – if we do this we will crack and fall into a squidzillion pieces never to be a whole again. Am I living in the hope of a Utopia? Please say it isn’t so….
© Kait King, 2015

Foot in mouth disease

foot in mouth

I loved university. I loved being up to my eyeballs in something I was fascinated with. The challenges and deadlines were all bonuses on top of the actual subject and I rose to greet each one. Anyway that’s by the by, so I’m in the lecture theater and the lecture is about to end. I know I’m getting a phone call very shortly so I excuse myself to go outside to wait for the call.

I get outside and there’s a kid doubled over, sitting pretty much folded over on the side bench. I wander to the bench, my phone out, texting and looking up as I walk. And I sit down on his right side. He shuffles over a little to make room. He is not moving much and my curiosity gets the better of me and I surreptitiously glance sideways at him. Yep, he is totally bent in half, but I do see his phone in his hand and he’s got his left hand side of his face plastered to his phone. Not the left hand side as in, his ear and talking, I mean like with his eye and not talking. Possibly taking a picture of his eye? Or the pupil of his eye? So without thinking for another second I pipe up with “I think you need glasses by the looks of things!” and chuckled a little, breaking the ice and everything. And this is my problem – my brain doesn’t engage with my mouth or vice versa – they work independently (against me!) so this is where I have ended up with this Foot in Mouth Disease – I’m a a frequent flyer.

Well, this kid looks up at me and one eye is covered with that cloud, the cloud that means that they can’t see much of anything out of that eye and the other one is scarred too.

He says, “It’s the only way I can see my texts – glasses won’t help…” I’m sitting there like an idiot. But I did what I usually do and chose not to ignore the elephant.

“So what happened to your eyes?” I asked.

He looked up from his phone again – well, as best as he could, and explained that he had been walking down Queen Street and it was winter. A super stormy day, and Queen Street can become like a wind tunnel on days like that. He had a jacket on that zipped up and as he grappled in the wind with it, the zip sliced across his eye, blinding him totally in his right eye and severely impinging on his sight in his left.

“I’m so sorry dude – really impressed you’re at university…I didn’t mean to be rude by the way….” I trailed off. He smiled, “It’s OK,” he says to me, ” at least you didn’t just walk away – that’s the worst. Everyone knows something’s up with my fricken vision. Lots of people don’t know what to do when they’re confronted with something unexpected…”

We were silent for a split second.

“I’m sorry this happened to you…. but I see in spite of a universal fuck-up in your life, you’re still here, still givin’ it all that!” he laughed at me and I laughed too.

“Often people so let the wrong things define who they are, or the worst things. The fact that you rise above this defines who you are.” He looked at me with a serious frown, somewhat created due to his lack of vision.

“Thank you for that, I needed to hear that right now…” he said.

I didn’t know his name but I did know much more about him than just some letters to identify him to his friends, family, fellow students and work colleagues. Not only that, but I found out even more about myself, or maybe about people. We all share commonalities – common likes, enemies, feelings, injustices etc. We all share bonds and those deeper threads of what make us who we are are far more interesting and important than your name, your clothes, your home, car, bank account…we truly are here to fill our souls and not our wallets. I take my soul with me when I go – I will leave my earthly belongings behind.

© Kait King, 2015

Treading Water

Speeding up

Slowing down

Maybe just going

Round and round

© Kait King, 2015

Kick-start

kickstart

Thunder claps slap me in my stomach and heart

the sound so loud I can feel it’s power to my core

the rain is disjointed, fragmented and like nails

brittle, metallic, piercing upon my tin roof

cold drapes her cape and darkness is too early

Winters’ chilly breathe clings to me and all else

with crispy grass and black icy roads

time hibernates,

in a torpor while waiting for

the kick-start of Spring

Iron grey afternoons, misty mornings and

chilly bedsheets

embrace every day with a choking chilliness

a resistant prisoner I will wait

as a hibernating bear or a frozen tundra

stillness and a rigor about me will be chipped away

with every day of Spring

as I am hurtled with a kick-start

back into a living thing

Is it

So do you think it may annoy you
should I love you too much
That time would trap you
in a heartbeat
If I won’t give you up
Is it crazy to think
that you will only touch
my skin
stroke my hair
and let me in
Will it be overwhelming if I say
I love you every day
leave notes in your lunchbox
and always want you to stay
the night
the week
forever
Is it rude of me to want all of you
not a share, a percentage or a piece
but the everything and nothingness
of you
the very most
and
the very least
© Kait King, 2015

Your Old Sweaty Shirt

That’s the last thing you wore

that held your warm body close

It was the last thing before

your heart and pressure slowed

A cloth got to finally hold you

something I never got to do

People say that it was better that way

But I don’t know if that’s quite true

I hold your once sweaty t-shirt

drenched now with my own tears

and try to inhale what’s left of you

As it fades from all the years

© Kait King, 2015

I buried you, I hope you don’t mind

What do you mean?
You don’t get it?
I’ve talked the hind leg
off a donkey
telling you why it is
what it is
and no
I don’t regret it
How can you say that?
How would you know?
I get pissed that
I’m not good enough
I won’t put my
assets on show
I watch you
watching yourself
under the radar
so low
Hiding who you
really are
and now I wish
I didn’t know
When did you do that?
Is it like someone I know?
There is no name, no face
No one to show
And I need a body
to bury
So I can let you go

© Kait King, 2015

Too much Too late Too soon

too soon,late

When it seems to me

that this is the end

you just keep coming back

to me, my friend

I say that word with a smirk

on my face

I can’t just be friends

and your shit’s at my place

you’ll look at me with

your shiny eyes

pull my heartstrings

like a baby’s cries

And it won’t matter

‘cos it’s all lies

Too much Too late Too soon

© Kait King, 2015

Please Don’t…

please don't

Please don’t make me

feel stupid

for cherishing you

Don’t laugh

at my love

I don’t know what else

to do

Although I guess

it’s pretty clear

that I’m not the one

for you

© Kait King, 2015

Cataclysmically Incorrect

If I win

I will have won this

fair and square

If I lose

I will have lost this

and won’t have to care

about you

or your new girlfriend

If I’m wrong

I will be cataclysmically incorrect

I will owe on every bet

and beg you to forget her

and her endless bank account

legs and youth

If you could just be brave

and tell the truth

But I see you squirming

awkward in your plush car seat

I can see the worm –

it’s turning

Now it’s with me

you cheat…

© Kait King, 2015

iPad or iCare?

ipad icare

We teach our kids

to have a smaller

phone

a faster car

a bigger home

We teach our kids

to take what

they can

Never mind

if you

stomp on

plant

animal or

man

Little

do we know

the devastating

result

will be that

human life

on Earth

will grind to

an abrupt halt

© Kait King, 2015

Something Nefarious

Nefarious

Something nefarious

is going on

Something deceitful

something quite wrong

Then something fantastic

is happening here

Someone’s falling in love

someone finally cares

Now something sad

has taken place

She can’t even bear

to look at his face

So something shocking

has now occurred

She killed them both

Have you heard?

Something nefarious

is going on

Something deceitful

something quite wrong

© Kait King, 2015

Music Love

Music to my ears
bouncing round my soul
shining through my eyes
making me feel full
precious stones of a polished melody
the funky bass is outta sight
pulling strings in harmony
the drums all sittin’ tight
the words are lazy, cruisey, bluesy
summer feeling
stealing through
the music drifting, holding
lifting
Music Love is true
my Music Love is true…
© Kait King, 2015

Who are we to Judge?

Who are we to judge

I have a secret

I will never tell

‘cos I think it will send me

straight to burn in Hell

Not by some god or

our changing Universe

but simply by Earths’ humans

the Worlds’ damning curse

Judgemental, judging

limited in their view

I must be of some demon

if I don’t see it like they do

© Kait King, 2015

What is it

imagesseductive cat

What do we want

from each other

what do we hope

to discover?

Are you a friend…

or my lover?

© Kait King, 2015

You know you know…..

you know you know

You already know –

You know you’ve

known for ages

But just didn’t

want to look into

that ugly face

or go to that

ugly place

You knew months ago

when he was angry with you

when all you did

was be excited he was home

and he turned his back

and left you there alone

You already knew

when you could

smell the hint of perfumes

that you know you

don’t wear

Those whispered

phone calls

He doesn’t want you

to hear

You already know –

you know you’ve known

for ages

but just didn’t

want to look

into that ugly lying face

or go to that

ugly empty place

© Kait King, 2015

Endless

Endless

And in dreamland

I traipse

with leaden feet

Frightened

of my reality

Awake

when I’m asleep

© Kait King, 2015

The Distance

The distance

between us

has run away

from me

Not even a little

puff of dust

did I get

to see

As the width,

the height,

the breadth,

the length –

Any kind of measure

you care

As it doesn’t

really matter

It only measures

the love

that’s not here

© Kait King, 2015

Kidnapped

kidnapped

You’re bundled

into a car

you don’t know

where you are

You can hear the

indicator blinking

And it triggers your

panicky thinking

You try to count wildly

at something

Knowing ultimately

that this isn’t helping

trying to remember

the twists and bends

Wondering how on Earth

will this all end

© Kait King, 2015

In the end

in the end

If I say that I don’t love you

will it make you stay

for another day

And if I pretend

that I really don’t care

would you want me more in the end

But the truth be told,

I cannot tell a lie

all of you just drives me

crazy

And for your love

I would surely die

Will you meet me there in the end?

© Kait King, 2015