Suicide – is it really a free ticket out?

Suicide

With a delicate stillness

and a quiet noise

with porcelain perfection

and perfect China poise

the body is supine

lying dead on the floor

supine in exsanguination

a choice to become Death’s whore

Ruby red your favourite colour

you wear it very well

although I won’t see you out much

a story we will tell

Did you get off scot-free?

Did you truly escape?

Or will you have to pay your dues

and return to this landscape…

© Kait King, 2015

Sweet Sugar Spike!

Sweet sugar spike

I am a chocolate addict

call me what you will

Mouth open wide

Chocolate pouring in

that’s how I’d get

my thrill

I am a sugar junkie

call it how you want

I order a starter to have

dessert

at the restaurant

Sweet tooth, sweet freak

call it what you like

but nothing makes me happier

than my sweet sugar

spike!

© Kait King, 2015

I’m Tired

im tired

I’m tired

Tired of not

being included

in your future

Even though

we have a five

year past

I’m tired

of grieving for

my future

When all

you do is

grieve for

your past

It won’t last…

Kait King 2020

At Lunch Today


At lunch today
I fell a little more
in love with you
Your smile grazes the
inside of my heart with
such passion
At lunch today
your blue eyes brighter
for seeing me
Sparkling over
sparkling water
with just a hint
of lemon
that cannot sour
our chemistry
At lunch today
while I watched you
talk
I followed your lips
watched your mouth
heard nothing
and thought just
about kissing
I love having
Lunch with you

© Kait King, 2017

A Seeker

I don’t want to be here
I don’t want to be here alone
I don’t want to be here alone
in my empty zone
I want to love
I want to love again
I want to love again and be free of all this pain
I can’t do it
I can’t just let it go
I can’t just let it go and
pretend I didn’t know
My soul aches
My soul and my heart ache badly
They ache for man’s cruel inhumanity
I’m a seeker
I’m a seeker of love,

peace, and harmony

I’m a seeker –

please tell me

you’ll follow me

© Kait King, 2015

Damn you, Dementia…


Mum at Kai Iwi Lakes, January 2019

You’ve watched me
Grow up
I’ve watched you
grow old
And I speak for you
Now
When I used to do
As I was told
Your face is
Still the same
And your eyes…
They sometimes
know
But your words
Are lost on me
And you
You don’t want me
To go…
I kiss you
Many times
Touch your face
And hug you
Tight
You ask me
Where my Dad is
You’re shocked
When I say
He’s gone…
into
The light

Kait King 2019

My Harry – Goodbye…

I know you’re

With Mum, now

But I miss you

All the same

I miss your constant

meow

And calling out

Your name

I miss you, My Harry

Things are just

Not the same

You’re not lieing

upside down

On the driveway

Or being a

Major pain

I don’t fall over you,

Anymore

And the fridge hasn’t

Been scratched

In a week

I miss stroking

your old body

That once was young

And sleek

I miss your sweet face,

My Harry –

Your cookie-making paws

Your teapot curled

fluffy tail

And everything and more…

Kait King 20th of May 2025

In memory of one of the coolest cats I’ve had the pleasure of sharing a fraction of my lifetime with, but all of his. I wasn’t ready to let him go. I have a massive empty space I don’t know how to fill right now.

Say what!?!

What was the last live performance you saw?

Me, deciding what jeans to peel myself into and out of. What a performance!😄😎

A Lovers’ Note

Lovers Note

Hi babe

There you are lying –

fast asleep

You are softly snoring

and my heart still

misses a beat

As the love in me

is so great

there is nothing I need

to contemplate

This is how you are to me

in all your vulnerability

but you will always be safe with me

if you can love – it will set you free

© Kait King, 2015

Say it – No…mean it

Disappointed Love, 1821. Oil on panel, 24 3/4 x 32 in. (62.8 x 81.2 cm). Inv.: FA.65[O].

You say the words

I want to hear

But your actions tell me

loud and clear

that you don’t even

want me here

© Kait King, 2015

The Unknown


And confusion rages
like a winter storm
pushing through my
veins and there’s nothing
I can think
Although there is plenty
I could do
But the storm is
blinding and vicious
And I’m thinking of
my life
Like between a rock
and a hard place
And no, I’m not trapped
I’m not unhappy…
with right now
As the ever-bleeding
heart I’m eased
into the terror of
the unknown
It’s not a bad dream
If it was I wouldn’t know if
I really want to wake up –
Does this just mean for me
that it’s time to face reality?

© Kait King, 2016

Predicktive or is that Unpredicktive Text …’

predicktive text

I am a Master bater

doh….

Baker…..!!!!

Master baker! :/

© Kait King, 2015

Mother’s Day every day

I walk down the aisle
my eyes passing over cards
words springing out
about Mum going
the whole nine yards
And I stop to read a few
The words just seem
insipid
when I think of you,
Mum
A journey into the intrepid
Four babies later
and over 60 years married
Through wars, tonsillitis,
tears and love you tarried
Now, here I am
a mother too
And these words I say: “I love you”
Have also come
from my son’s mouth
and heart
But to say them to you
doesn’t even begin to start
to express what a fantastic Mum you’ve been
You’ve done a good job,
I’m a good human being
So I tell you you’re an amazing Mum
and people are proud
of the job you’ve done!
© Kait King, 2015

Blessed Carrion

Blessed Carrion

Beleaguered bones

please carry me there

Flattened feet

walk on

Before an age of telephones

while life is unfair

a vicious sweet

a blessed carrion

you read

you eat

walk on

© Kait King, 2015

Crush

Crush

You crush me

Yes, you’re bigger

than me

You’d have to be blind

not to see

that you’re twice the size

of me

But I’m getting tired of

being pushed around

I hate the way you always

bring me down

Slutting yourself all over

this town

And I lie here

so crushed – so deep

underground

© Kait King, 2016

But…

images

But…

I let you in

Nobody

gets in

You’re supposed to stay

not walk away

I shared

everything –

gave you my all

you were supposed to love me

not push me

and watch

me fall

© Kait King, 2016

Thought # 1

thought 1

If you’re very rarely or never told “No” or don’t have to wait or work for anything, will it be a harder struggle to get on in the World? (This is based on most normal and reasonable of situations – single or separate parenting included and of course, on a continuum).

In the “Real World” no one else treats you the same way as your parents do. No one else cares the same way for you as your parents do. No one else in the World will give you the same leeway. Will one lack a certain resilience because one can’t deal with a No, or don’t understand why it’s a No?

Your Ego takes a beating, hearing all those ‘yeses’ and how wonderful you are at everything and then a No would just take the wind right out of your sails, it’s a shock. Is it about that resilience? Even against adversity and with all the curve balls life throws you, wouldn’t it be better to be able to face that adversity? I am not talking about being a nagging No Hound about everything – but I do think we need to prepare our children for “out there”! Just tell them the truth, make them stand for something, let them know what their strengths and weaknesses are and let them embrace them all and use them to their best advantage in this crazy Life.

If it is about resilience then we must give our children that strength and fight. They need these things to be able to survive – and not just survive but to live well.

Kait King 2017

Whoever you are

I just want you to know

that you are not alone

I know it sounds empty –

we can’t talk

I can’t hug you

I can’t invite you into my home

But I need you to know

that there is someone out there

someone who also feels the same

is sick of the same game

and shares the same fears

If I can make you understand

this is not what defines you

but the choices you make

from this day forward

even when you don’t know

what to do

© Kait King, 2015

Dark Man

darkman

What cruel god

sent you to me

dark hair

dark eyes

dark soul

What fallen angel

turned on me

bitter anger

bitter words

bitter mind

What desperado

begged to be

the embittered mind

and darkened soul

in me

© Kait King, 2015

knuckle-bite-fright



warped, crippled
twisted and blackened
my monsters will be set free
decrepit, decayed,
barren of soul
sit here or there
and all will see
Damaged, Dangerous,
Dark and Fright
my monsters travel day or night

bad dreams,

bad thoughts,

dark dreams,

No light –

not all is as it seems

with knuckle-bite fright….

© Kait King, 2015

Conversation 3 with a Gemini

Conv 3Artista-obra-Geminis_LNCIMA20150510_0070_27

“I’m so bored

but I’ve got so much

to do!”

“So what have you done then?”

“Nothing…

And you?”

© Kait King, 2017

whoopdeefrickendoo

crap no map

So it’s another day – whoopdeefrickendoo

Another uncharted territory I have to see myself through

crap…

no map

© Kait King, 2015

New Zealand’s Madness – My Heartbreak

I never wanted to use my WordPress site as an openly resistant, political page, but I feel that right now, I’m left with no other option.

New Zealand, the beautiful clean and green, happy little island country we are portrayed as, by the government and its departments, is just not true.

Wellington protests against mandating experimental drugs.
3rd of November 2021

In the last few months I’ve been witness to the uprising of Kiwis who have just had enough. Groups of peaceful people who want to see change to the tyrannical government, its subsidiaries, fascist politicians, policies, borders and mandates.

Jacinda Ardern, our shitty leader, is dropping radically in the political world. She is viewed as both a fascist and a communist, holding hands too tightly with the CPP for most of our comfort.

Many of us are against doing that to ourselves let alone our kids. Now we have lockdowns, borders and mandates. But for what? In NZ 500 plus people die of the flu every year, in TWO years Covid has killed 33 people here. With a worldwide survival rate of 99.93% the reaction to this virus has been like way, waaaay over the top. So is there something else going on here? Why do you need booster shots? Did the last 2, 3 or 4 not work? This ‘vax” has not one iota of Covid in it. By definition a vaccine has a part of the virus in it for your body to learn to recognise it. I see sports people dropping like flies after their jabs and booster shots. Young people just dropping dead on the field in the middle of a game or training.

Known locally as The Prime Sinister, she has mandated an experimental vax (I just can’t call it a vaccine, because it just isn’t!). With all of the scaremongering going on worldwide about Covid-19 and the Delta variant, many were duped (and I really do mean tricked!), into getting this fucking jab that I believe is poisonous, untested and has a very unsound background.

The Prime Sinister’s husband, sorry, life partner?, told families to hold the grandchildren to ransom to get the grandparents vaxxed. What the actual fuck!?! Who would EVER say that, to withhold anyone from anyone like that is pure and simple BLACKMAIL. Our Prime Sinister has sunk to the lowest levels. Our mainstream media also paid off by the big guys, their reporting belittling the amount of Kiwi’s turning up to protest. Now she flies everywhere because where she goes, the protesters go. We are reported and spoken of as anti-vaxxers and that is the furthest thing from the truth. We just want the CHOICE to do the jab or not. We are just pro choice and freedom. Why are we trapped from our loved ones? This Covid virus is just another flu, stay home if you’re sick and even less people die from it. If a vaccine was to be mandated shouldn’t it be for the flu that kills over 500 people a year? None of this is making sense and we need to connect the dots and take action. Someone in power and a position of trust has way more accountability and needs to answer the people. There’s plenty of clips and information online showing Ardern not addressing questions and avoiding press. I believe there should be a council elected by the people – I’m not sure how that works, but not one oligarchic egotistical tyrant should rule over anybody singularly.

On the 15th of November thousands of healthcare workers, teachers, doctors, nurses and everybody else in that sector had to choose between the jab or their job. Thousands walked out yesterday. Our prime sinister is a bully and an out of control political leader. She will go down in history as one of the most hated and divisive leaders of New Zealand. She has split up families, stopped people seeing each other, stopped people hugging and loving each other, scared children and is now trying to poison them too. The list is endless and I wish to see her and her clowns removed from the government and held accountable for the inhumanity to man. Many human rights have been broken and we, the People, will unite and will take our home back from these evil vulgar elitist monsters.

So this is my rant about my home, in a nutshell. We are fed up and wanting the world to see NZ in the real shadow of this evil dictator. We, the people, want our home back.

Kait King – spoken on behalf of those freedom fighters who feel the same way!

16th July 2023

UPDATE: The new National government is in power, and nothing has really changed. It’s the same indoctrinated poisoned barrel of apples in government seats again. Those who spoke up got elected and are now silent to the cause of freedom for Kiwis. The future of us all rests in the hands of We, The People.

The first time

first timejpg

The first time

it wasn’t that much

fun

before I got

my panties off

he was already

done…

© Kait King, 2015

This Buzzy Little Feeling



There’s this buzzy
little feeling –
right in the center of me
And although my body is weighted
something in there
has zero gravity
Is that my Troubled Spirit
or could it be my Lonely Soul?
If I caste this bodily feeling
is it my Spirit that makes me
Whole?

© Kait King, 2016

You Are Never Alone

I am not

Somebody

I am

Everyone

My tears

are Ours

My time

is Hours

Running in

to Days

Years

Decades

I am not

Some Body

I am

Every One

My Heart

beats

a Song

that

my Spirit

sings along

Broken but

Hopeful

Sad but

a Dreamer

I am not

Somebody

I am

Everyone

Kait King 17th February 2020

A present for a poo – for doggie lovers

It doesn’t matter what you do

chew up my panties

leave a present that’s a poo

bury personal items

dig a deeper hole

drag cow dung inside

pee on the stripper pole

rip up the newspaper

before it’s even read

take up most of the room

in my double bed

chew a cavern in the chair

bark at things that are not there

but I’d like to make it very clear –

There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you

even though I’m only worth a poo

I really, really do love you 🙂

(Just to make things clear, I’m talking about a dog, not my man!)

© Kait King, 2015

Rock Bottom

I hit rock bottom
I sat on that bottom rock
weeds and roots
tethered me close
and not in a Lovers’ Lock
Catatonic in my despair
broken like a car crash victim
I clutched at straws
and sucked in air
feeling like I needed
Lithium
Overwhelmed by what
I’m not
broken by what I was
fighting what it has to be
a fallen star, a lost cause,
tell it as it is
that old me
will never leave
it’s a part of what makes me
my body may have
let me down
but when I write ,

I’m free

© Kait King, 2015

No Way

There’s just no stopping
a speeding bullet
straight to the heart
With no clanking armour
or a bullet-proof vest
so it rips you apart
There’s just no way
to make it unscathed
through the day
with no love and no hope
no string to cling to
No reason to stay
© Kait King, 2015

Summer Daze

I feel

the sunshine

on my face

through emerald

branches

like delicate

spider-web lace

I feel

the warm

and soothing rays

of those dreamy

summer days

I wish I could

go back

to that place….

© Kait King, 2015

Gasping for Air

Love flutters
like a drowning butterfly,
swallowed up
whole –
Struggling to keep my
head above the
ripples of your heart
Yet still wanting to be
hopelessly – no,
recklessly
flung into those depths
drowning…
drowning…

Kait King

Lucky


Every second we suck in air, a child is hurt or dying somewhere in the world – that makes air a pretty high commodity and a very expensive way to look at breathing our air. Therefore make it worthwhile, make it count, but make it count in love and kindness, caring and passing on joy – not just to children but to all. Breathe your air with purpose, you’re really lucky, every day is a blessing 🙂 Kait King 2016

Lovers lock

lovers lock

Lovers locked

in this bittersweet

ride

Trapped in the momentum

a beat of the heart

Skipping through hope

not a care in the

world

Lovers locked close

just a boy

and a girl

© Kait King, 2015

  Another song for Jay


There’s a part of me
that will always go on
I’ve shared this with our Mother Earth
She called him my son
There’s nothing so wild
as the ride that we’re on
mother and child
a bond
we hold on
And there you were
with paintbrush eyelashes
A baby blue blanket
and everything about you was so small
And here you are
with a shy tattoo on you
An eye, ear, lip piercing
And everything about you now is tall
There’s all of you
that makes me smile
When you hug me so big and
hang around for a while
There’s you and me and then
everybody else
I never knew that it would be you
to teach me about myself

© Kait King, 2015
I love you Jay 🙂 xxx

That’s What I’m After

What I'm after

It’s your eyes

It’s your mouth

It’s your smile

your heart

your laughter

But it’s my heart

my fear

It’s my love

my hope

That’s what I’m after

Kait King 2017

I need one of those dogs

i need one of those dogs

Listening quietly

in the dawn

of the day

My mind

playing games

that my heart

won’t play

Watching us still

in the dark

of my mind

waiting for someone

I can’t seem to find

Holding this close

Not wanting to lose

Making the choice

and then having

to choose

As the falling rain

dampens my heart

I can’t seem to see,

Was I blind

from the start?

© Kait King, 2015

Conversations with a Gemini



I don’t accept it!

Fine – kid yourself

How long do you think you can keep this up for?

As long as it takes…why?

You’ll die before you realise the truth y’know…

Whaaaaat??

Well, the truth is, acceptance.

If you accept it, it can’t fight you

That’s fine but what if I’m looking for a fight!

Whaaaaat??

Thank Dog for Star Signs

the-gemini-in-me

“I have to find the darker side of myself when I write as the killer – I think it’s the Gemini in me….”

© Kait King, 2015

Timing is EvErYtHiNg

aaperfect-timing-eaaqaaaaaaaanjaaaajdq1mtq1ntc5ltmyndetngnlnc05zgiwlthjn2nlmdllmmi5yg

Hindsight is a fabulous thing

It’s just that its timing is all wrong

© Kait King, 2016

Stuck!

Stuck!

My imagination

is my destination

~ my holiday abroad

My situation

is not my creation

~ but the pain won’t be ignored

© Kait King, 2015