Doubtful

doubtful

You know deep down

inside of you

What is wrong

and when it’s true

You do know that

you have a voice

You can escape if

you make the choice

You know even

if shit goes down

That you will handle it

without

support around

Sometimes you feel like

you’d be better off dead

But you have to

remove those thoughts

Stay positive

Keep your head

© Kait King, 2017

Now ThAt’S Crazy-

Ted Bundy

Ted Bundy

Our monsters don’t look

like monsters

There is no way to tell

If they’ll share a slice of Heaven

or bring the hate of Hell

They don’t all have dangerous killer looks

they are not all uneducated and despise books

Look at Ted, a prime example

of a learned man who was extremely harmful

Ted Bundy, yes

he was an educated man

but not smart enough

to avoid the hang man

Then there’s really insane

Like Mr Ed Gein

who danced in the moonlight with his mother’s skin on his face

© Kait King, 2015

Sword of Damacles

Sword of Damacles

When you’re hanging by a thread

and the voices in your head

say “just let go”

When you feel torn and down

you try to take a look around

but find

you’re blind

And the time is running out

and you know what it’s about

you can feel that hanging rope

that blade against your throat

and you lean on in….

© Kait King, 2015

In The Grip Of god’s daughter

no-welcome

Twisted

I’m finding it hard at times, to write god’s daughter. I have to go to such a dark place and think such dark thoughts that it can be exhausting…and actually put me off writing this story. I don’t know where she has come from, but she won’t leave me alone until I’ve told her story.

Isn’t it a strange way to look at one’s own internal thoughts? I mean, she’s just a made up character, right?! But I feel like I’ve had zero control over where this is going. She is what she is and I’m writing about it. Is she a part of me? Is she always going to be a part of me or will she let me go when I’ve written her out? The longer I delay writing god’s daughter, the longer she will be stalking around in my head. Could she end up taking over? A blemish on the intriguing landscape of my brain. I’m wasting time…I must write…

Summer in my Heart

summer in my heart

The grass squeaks

beneath my feets

Cold steals well into

my bones

Chilly cows in

frosty fields

complain in

mooing moans

The sun is

shining watery bright

glistening drips from

my watery nose

In the shade

of the rock garden

lies a frosty

useless hose

The dogs’ little

paws

hardly leave

a mark

It’s beautiful but

not my favourite time

I have Summer

in my heart

© Kait King, 2016

Pre-Occupancy

Pre-Occupancy

So nobody’s home

Just cardboard cut-outs

posed in my brain

Memories I can’t let go

Pre-Occupancy

A way to survive

Somehow to numb

the pain

Somehow to stay

the child

Pre-Occupancy

Merely a distraction

Something to hide

any connection

Anything to avoid

taking action

Pre-Occupancy

© Kait King, 2017

Glazed and confused

glazed n confused

They’re staring at me

those doughnut holes

the sprinkles and

that fucking maple syrup glaze

Those different flavoured

cream-filled ones

screaming out my name

They ooze confidence

knowing my desire

my taste buds inflamed

those gooey pink shades

that sticky chocolate shine

that fucking maple syrup glaze

I can’t make up my mind

© Kait King, 2015

Old Words Lost

Kiss it

The Japanese have called this generation “The Strawberry Generation” – this is because they bruise easily, have no resilience and give up in a heart beat. Because everything is so readily available on-line, whether it be from clothes to sex – you can own it, see it, have it – now, pretty much. I notice that our young people are not used to having patience or having to work for anything because everything is just ‘there’. So have we created a generation of spoiled brats? Or impatient and uncontrollably angry and frustrated youths? Are these people going to be the adults that have to look after our elderly generation? I don’t mean to cluster everybody into the same box, as this is not fair or true, but I do believe that many of our young people have these attitudes and belief structures about life.

Along with instant gratification there is also this “throw away mentality”, so we have the availability and the discarding instantaneously, of just about everything. This is now not just the discarding of unwanted objects like clothes or a cell phone, but the discarding of humanity. We throw away so much – even letters that belong in words. But that’s ok – I get it, it’s simpler, quicker, textier….it just feels like the next generation is forgetting how to spell – or never learned, or how to use grammar – capital letters, even. It just seems a little sad…and throw away, and wasteful…and sometimes fucking annoying to try and decipher when I shouldn’t be bothering anyway, but I do try.

I don’t think I would care so much if I wasn’t so into words, language, creating stories or getting a point across. I don’t want to live without words like devotion, loyalty, dignity, grace, honour. Not only that, but I want those words to be relevant in day to day relationships – at home, at work, at play. To operate in the world with dignity, with grace – these things seem not to have been shown to many young women. I want those words returned to us as women, I want them to be a part of how women are described. Not skanks, sluts, bitches, snobs, beeatch and every other name that is used to describe us these days.

And who wants to be loyal to, devoted to or honour a slag anyway?