Phantom Job Syndrome

phantom job syndrome

So in a nutshell, I’m at my psychiatrists – I’ve gone from hero to zero and today during my “session” about learning how to be a zero (that’s my perception), I was asked what it was like now having to re-define myself. what did I miss about my job? Funny thing was, the first thing I thought about was the office chair races we used to have at 3 am on night shift. Wheeling ourselves frantically up and down the hallway while a skeleton shift jangled its bones of authority at the miscreants in society, ourselves in the watch house excluded, of course. I smiled to myself, thinking of those nutty days which were not so long ago, but were so far out of reach it may as well have happened in the Pleistocene age. Then the loss welled up in me and I realised I would not be having any more office chair races, not at that Police station or any other at any time of the day or night…ever. So my doctor is great and hands me the tissues and asks me what’s happening and I say I can’t let it go. That this is like when those who have lost a limb feel that it is still there, still very much a part of them, Phantom Leg Syndrome – and that I have Phantom Job Syndrome. She laughed and said this was a great analogy and I felt grateful that she understood.

I just wished I could be The Phantom. I didn’t say that bit – I thought we’d end on a good note 😉

Too bad


Too good to leave you
too bad to stay
when I think of life without you
I don’t want to end this way
Too hard to swallow
too much to bear
when I realise it’s all about you
and that you don’t really care

© Kait King, 2015

I am a Winner

iamawinner

Everyone is so obsessed with winning at everything – work, sports, relationships – absolutely everything. I wonder if those people who are so focused on winning every argument, every game, every decision – have ever thought that they can let it go – like everybody’s a winner in the biggest race of all as far as I’m concerned. If you’ve been born then you have won the biggest race of all! You are a winner – the biggest winner out of millions of other sperm that were in a race for life – I am a winner – we won! Now let’s just succeed at being our own very best here instead of obsessing about being better than someone else’s best…

The Dance

The Dance

Devil’s dancing

in your eyes

tonight my anger’s

turning

lust related

through your lies

and now my anger’s

burning

Trust deflated

a poor disguise

today my anger’s

hurting

Love forgotten

nowhere to hide

tomorrow my heart

is yearning

© Kait King, 2015

I Thought It Was You

I thought it was you -Picture of Heart

Something

is missing

since we’ve

been apart

A part is missing

Something

has been lost

and I thought

it was you

Since you’ve been gone

I thought that piece

was you

A part of me

has been missing

I truly thought

it was you

But when I look at

it closely

it was a part of me

you took –

I was missing

not you

© Kait King, 2016

Duty, Cathedrals and St Francis

Duty st francis and cathedrals

Please be kind to all animals❤️❤️

I walk in

I can’t speak

the reverence

sucks the air

out of me

candles glitter

in shapes of love

for all of the animals

bestowed from above

And if it is what

they say to be true,

if I’m shaped like the shape

of a god, just like you,

I know that I am duty-bound

to share that love for all

all around

© Kait King, 2015

Please Be Kind To All Animals

Fused, but not at the hip

Fused but not at the hip

I was standing at the front desk, chatting to another work colleague and an awkward scrawny middle-aged man came up to the counter. I was in the watch-house at the Police Station. Being closest, I turned to talk to him. Behind me, I could feel everyone else cringe. I wasn’t sure why, but it dawned on me as I chatted with him to find out what he was here for, why the audible intake of air from my colleagues. I was just in work zone and had been troubleshooting all day.

Let me start from the beginning. When I turned up for work that morning – it was like 4 am or something horrific, being shift work. Anyway, we had three women and a man in our team that night and as shift changed over everyone caught up and swapped information – did the hand over thing. Of course we all gossiped about things we had dealt with, seen or heard that day, what the constables had been up to, failed at, succeeded in catching, blah blah blah and of course, some real oddities and this was one of them.

A young detective came into the office after his shift to catch up with us. I must say, he looked a little green around the gills but I didn’t think anything about it at the time. He gathered those of us who wanted to see (only myself and the guy I worked with), some evidential photographs of a case of abuse. It took a couple of seconds for him to get his personal screen and files up. He knew I was interested in the abuse of the vulnerable, certainly children, but the animals, handicapped and elderly were all in my sights and desperately needed help. So the photos upload to his screen and I take a second to understand what I’m looking at. I thought a burnt body initially and then realised she was on a gurney in a hospital with tubes and an oxygen mask swallowing her “White-walker”-type face. I turned to the detective and with a rather incredulous tone asked him if she was actually alive.

“She is,” he said, “she’s still alive. This woman’s son was supposedly looking after her. Somebody who managed to finally get into the house found her and called an ambulance.”

“I just can’t believe someone so thin is still sucking in air! And how old is she?” Her dirty, mottled skin was just managing to cling to the bones of her body. She was filthy – hadn’t been washed properly in years.

“She’s 92. When we got to the hospital they told us that it was a miracle. I personally think maybe not – poor woman. Her son hadn’t fed her properly or washed her, medical needs ignored. She had maggots crawling around in her vagina…”

“What the fuck! Are you serious man!?” I was mortified.

“I knew you’d love this case Kait,” he said smiling up at me from the desk chair. ” Not only that but her toes had fused themselves together – there was green mould and a stink you would never believe possible. She smelt dead but was breathing – the living dead, literally!” he looked quite pleased with himself at the reality of his reference.

“I’m absolutely stunned! So what did her son say…has he been arrested then?” I ask.

“No, not yet anyway – he’s coming in to be assessed by the psyche team and questioned. Apparently he didn’t know he was doing anything wrong…whatever!”

“Good grief! Who’s he been sleeping with if he thinks it’s normal for flies to come out of a woman’s hoohaa!” We had a bit of a giggle – it’s like that in the face of horror. Apparently she had gangrene as well, on her fingers and other extremities. One of the worst abuse cases I’ve ever seen and I’m sure many of the police – even seasoned ones – felt that way too.

So the day carried on and we had all sorts of shit hitting the fan – parolees, detainees, people who had lost kids, found kids, P cooks, drunken idiots, abusive situations – just the usual crap.

So anyway here is this awkward guy in front of me. I am my usual helpful self and ask him what I can do. He tells me he’s here for an interview with a certain detective. I contact the right detective to come and get him from the watch-house, in the meanwhile I say “So are you having a good day?” just to be polite and make his wait in a police station a little less awkward. I had no idea what he was here for – he could be being interviewed as a witness for all I knew. Well this was a trigger question for him as he just spilled his guts to me about how he had hurt his mother even though he was trying to look after her. He told me about the maggots and the mould – as if I was giving him the interview. It only took him a few minutes to vent his story and he stood quietly with his head down in front of my counter.

“How come you didn’t clean her or help her to clean herself?” I asked cautiously, making eye contact with him.

“Well….I….I….” he bumbled along.

“It’s OK,” I said “you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to…” I trailed off.

He looked pleadingly up at me and I could see tears peeking out of the corners of his eyes.

“I want to.” he whispered.

I kept quiet.

He took a deep breath in and said “That’s my mum y’know ? I don’t want to wash her there or her top chest or anything! It’s not right…I’m her son – not even a daughter – I couldn’t do it!” The tears fell off his face. After initially feeling slightly ill talking to him, I found I was feeling sorry for him.

“Hell, I can understand that.” And I certainly could.

“So can you tell me why she’s so thin then? Why didn’t you feed her anything?” I pushed on through because there must be some accountability here. How can he get out of this one? Surely if he’d fed her she wouldn’t look like this. I tried to keep the picture of the poor old woman in my head, the decrepit, stinking semi-corpse that was his mother, to give her justice and keep a strong mind in this.

“I tried – I tried everything but she wouldn’t eat anything! I tried to force her but she choked so badly I was afraid to give her anything…I know now that this was wrong…” he looked down at his shoes, the tears still rolling off his nose and landing on the stations’ loud carpet. “She was my mum and she used to beat the crap outta me if I talked back or didn’t do as she bid. So I listened to her when she shook her head away from the spoon or growled at me, I left her alone….I was scared…” A slipknot of snot was making it’s way out of his nose and I tried desperately to keep a gag down. I managed. I passed him a box of tissues gingerly – not wanting to touch his skin at all.

Thankfully the detective who was going to do the interview arrived and took him through the security doors to an interview room. I stood there for a moment and realised where the blame lay in this. Society, society was to blame. Yes, he was at fault for not contacting the hospital or some sort of care for his mother, but he didn’t know anyone would help him. Surely if his neighbours had just said hello once in a while to the slightly, strange, creepy guy he might not be suffering endless guilt as it dawns on him in his slow mind what he has actually done. And his mother would not have had to suffer the enduring starvation and pain she had. It is about accountability – but who is accountable? We call ourselves a welfare state but whose welfare are we really caring for? I consider this man and his mother both victims in this instance and a severe failure on our many organisations parts. He was charged with numerous offences relating to the abuse of the elderly. I wondered if he wanted to lay charges against his mum for what she had done to him – for the monster she had created in him who would become her living nightmare.

What’s really sad is he will more than likely end up like his mum did….

© Kait King, 2015

A new darkness stirs within…

a new darkness

As a writer I sometimes struggle to write and other times it just falls out of me. Sometimes I wonder where what I write about comes from. I know I make a calculated plan – the skeleton or bones – of an idea but then the flesh just layers upon it, creating the monster. The words used, the feelings created and the imagery perceived is what the end goal is.

A new character with a new idea of the world and what it owes them or what they must pay to live in my book, emerges. I know the title, I know her, I know her story. I would like to share this journey with you too. The beginning of gods’ daughter…..

© Kait King, 2015

Too Often…

A&E photo

Thank you to the A&E doctors

nurses, surgeons – the lot

who saved a dying boy

who took a hit

from a gun

shot

© Kait King, 2015

Atlas

I’ll take the world

off your shoulders

Take me to bed

tonight

We can lose our

harsh reality

we’ll make love

by candlelight

© Kait King, 2015

No, it’s not!

Real life

This is not a Horror Movie

This is Real Life

Where a Mother kills her Child

or a Husband kills a Wife

© Kait King, 2016

Horrocide

Death by fright
3 am in the night
when slimy things
crawl with evil
intention
where Coffin Flies fly
and the sky is a scar
that’s all you get to look at
not to mention
a stinking mattress and
a heavy clanking chain
she saw what he did to the other girls’ brain
A frantic
frenzied
desperate head
pleading, begging, wishing
to be dead
Haunting
hurting
watching eyes
that cut glass with spite
coming for you
strangling life
killing you with fright

© Kait King, 2015

Cloudy days ahead

So my life goes on

without you

every day I

feel the pain

sleeping in our bed

without you

sunshine just

turned to rain

In your world

do I take up space?

Am I somewhere

in your mind?

Have I got a

special place

even though you

left me behind?

© Kait King, 2015

This is Life

Suddenly, the world is
flat –
as I scan the horizon
of my life
I see the shadows
of my past
and the reality
of the present
And I see the light
of the future
With open arms and open
wide eyes
I welcome what is
to come – for
this is Life
The shape of my future
I know –
I have held it
in my soul
and now it lies in my hands
waiting…

© Kait King, 2016

Does Anyone Ever

Does anyone ever

Does anyone else

ever feel

That this world

isn’t real?

That you know

you don’t belong

Perhaps the ‘Big Guy’

got it wrong

This is not

where you’re meant

to be

Running on the

hamster wheel –

trapped

and not free

Do you ever

think to yourself:

“I am the ostracized alien

I am the one

who doesn’t

fit in!”

And decide to make

a concerted effort

But remain

disappointed

So you retreat

and think,

“Fuck it”

© Kait King, 2016

Vulnerable

vulnerable

My lifetime

a blink in history

it may as well all be

in my head

Love strings

playing with

my heart

already

too much has

been said…

© Kait King, 2015

Acceptance

freedom_by_la_chapeliere_folle-d5k7a56

For me: “Acceptance is an attempt at freedom”

© Kait King, 2015

The Real Zombies

the real zombies

I live on an island and we are very much an outdoors crowd, particularly water sports – besides swimming; I loved horse riding, kick-boxing and wrestling. But now I find I’m pretty much a forced recluse due to the inoperable and permanent nerve damage from 2 failed surgeries, which affects my left side in a chronic-acute-neuralgic-pain-syndrome kind of way :\

I call myself a cave bear as I really am just hibernating…. or am I in a cocoon ready to show the newly morphed me? Instead I am left with what feels like a bad experiment. So I don’t go out much – you don’t when you deal with chronic pain – it’s exhausting. It’s just too painful, hard, embarrassing and awkward to go out.

Anyhoo, back to the story. I went to talk to my shrink for an hour today – she is lovely; spiritual, intuitive, and…. hold onto your hats, she does not believe in CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). Instead she believes in the meta-conscience, an intriguing concept and much more of a fit for me.

So I understand it’s all about identifying myself now – not who I was, but who I am now. I am not sure of what defines me now – in all entirety. I was absolutely convinced I had found my calling when I joined the police with the goal to help our kids. So my faith in me is shaken and I’m finding out who I am as this other me. I know I will get through this because this is my journey – somehow there will be some sense in all of this pain. I was on enormous amounts of methadone in 1998 along with gabapentin, fentanyl and a dozen other medications. I couldn’t even shower myself or brush my teeth. For years I was a zombie until something inside me said “Kait, this is not you – this is not who you are and this is not what should define you.” So I took a long time weaning myself off the medication and I survived when I was supposed to die, I managed to have a life when I was told my life was over. It’s a horror story and not one I want to write but I got through that – dealt with pain on a daily basis through no help of anyone else and carved a life for myself and my son, who had lost me for nearly 5 years already.

Then I give up everything to go to get my degree in Criminology. My son is grown up and doing his own thing. I graduate in 2011 – start my job and slip on my front step. Need a discectomy – it goes badly wrong and triggers old pain syndrome from lung nerve damage of 1998 into its rabid self. I’m in the high dependency unit again – major drugs. I begged everyone around me that if anything should happen they are not to put me on that poisonous methadone. They put me on morphine instead and so the hell has rolled on for the past two years with no positive outcomes. There has been a barrage of medications again and I don’t want to have to take them. Sometimes I feel like a failure when I have to succumb because I am in so much pain but I don’t know what else to do. And the knives I put in my own back become innumerable in this too.

So yeah – I use self-hypnosis and breathing techniques – I do my best not to take medication. It dumbs me down and kills any motivation toward anything. It kills you on the inside too so you don’t have any spirit to feel human any more or to fight for a life – it consumes you in a rolled up carpet, a dark cupboard and deaf/mute existence. I see so many people who are left dependent on heavy medication and with no existence – these are the true zombies of the world. These are the walking dead, the emotionally unfeeling, uncaring and unknowing. It’s almost a way of keeping things quiet….Don’t let them get you 😉

Write is write and wrong is wrong

write is write

© Kait King, 2015

The Double Edged Sword

double egd sword

My sister went with me, a few years ago now, to an insurance assessment (for want of a better word)! And I came away needing to do eleventeen blood tests and pee in a bottle etc. I also came away feeling angry as I believed this meeting was supposed to have been to assess the level of disability I suffered from the nerve damage, acute chronic neuralgic pain syndrome, epidural fibrosis, hypersensitivity and arachnoidosis (due to two failed surgeries – this is in a nutshell). I wasn’t supposed to be diagnosed again, surely! Why hadn’t the specialist received the right instructions as in: this is an assessment not a diagnosis – we know she’s fucked we just want you to tell us by how much. So he tests and pricks and squeezes and listens – asks a million questions and of course, being paid by the insurance company the implication is that I have had pre-existing conditions and that I was susceptible to this nerve damage = no pay out for Kait – no way to fix Kait – permanent and inoperable – Yippee for the insurance company – bad luck for me.

Anyway I kept my cool, I went for those tests, to more doctors, more reminders of how hard it is to get around, how dependant I am in certain circumstances, how limited I am – yadda yadda yadda. My sister takes time off from work again to take me to the second meeting which we have had to wait 5 weeks to get. We are shuffled into his office and he slowly goes through all eleventeen tests and …. all of my tests have come back clear.

I have always been fit and healthy and I have always known that I have never had a pre-existing condition. This is what they tried to do with me 17 years ago when I had my first treatment injury. I was supposed to have microsurgery – that’s what I signed for and what was explained to me by the registrar. I had a collapsed lung at the time so it was serious.

So I go into surgery and a practising thoracic surgeon who is not qualified yet, butchers me and gives me a major thoracotomy – stitches the tubes into my nerves in my lung . Then the tubes that drain off the excess fluid from your lung as you heal, must be removed after 3 or so days, the nurse pulls it out in one movement as you breathe out and supposedly out comes the tube….and yes the tube came out, after it was yanked so hard the nerves were dragged to the outside of the wound from the tube placement. Long story short – I am sent to hell. I never really got back. I am given several epidurals up and down my spine, Pethidine shots and all sorts of crap to control it. Apparently I almost died.

In order to be able to get home after 17 days in ICU I end up on mountains of heavily monitored medication like methadone, fentanyl, gabapentin, and loads of other stuff to just keep me like a zombie. So now it was a living hell, no medical support. I weaned myself off all of that shit over 5 years and they had told me I would be on it forever – that I would be an invalid for the rest of my life. I wasn’t that kind of person so I healed myself, taught myself, coped myself – with no support whatsoever from any medical background, just my amazing family who had to put up with me. That was in 1998 and then another failed surgery in 2013.

But what was interesting was when I argued that I had signed for minor keyhole surgery in 1998 I was told that because of my history of endometriosis the surgeon had to perform this open major surgery. Another scapegoat situation. I have never had endometriosis in my life before or have ever been diagnosed with it. It didn’t matter what I said I was stonewalled and back then just wanted to get my life back. No one guided or helped, they just left me hanging.

The implication I have been living with for the past 8 years has been also to try and identify that I had some pre-existing condition…but no, nothing, no heart attack enzymes, auto- immune deficiencies, muscular dystrophy, diabetes, my bloods and liver were 100%. Nicky and I knew this – this is why it has been such a devastating blow to be fit and healthy and then for someone to ruin your life. Twice…. But in trying to stay positive – the radium injection x-ray I had which highlighted all of the nerve damage that has been caused by these botched surgeries only made it even more crystal clear that the surgeons did the damage – my body has absolutely nothing wrong with it except for the damage they did to it. In which case, one would hope, the insurance company surely can’t deny that this is not my fault and it’s high time I was paid what was due. When you pay your insurance fees your whole working life to protect yourself from poverty, dependency and for every other reason you can think of, it really stings when you have no clout and see your life becoming pointless.

I have often felt re-victimised due to the treatment of the so-called treatment facilities that I have had to participate in. Anyway, as good as the news is that there is absolutely nothing wrong with me, it is equally as devastating as I should be living a normal healthy life, just like I was. I want my job back, I want to do my Masters – yet I still owe for my Criminology degree and get penalised again. It’s a double-edged sword – almost like if only I had some disease to be the answer for this happening to me – not just “a treatment injury” that is only worth so many dollars to someone who knows nothing about me….and worth absolutely zero to the surgeons who wouldn’t even remember my name.

You’re Leaving…

What is there
to say?
I can’t force you
to stay
I don’t want you to
feel bad
So I try real hard not to
be sad
And I smile and wave to you
goodbye
As I turn, my smile slips and
I just cry

© Kait King, 2016

A Prince


Prince –
Royalty to Sound
Beautiful brain and
a sweet Heart
With Mastery over Music
and a Legend with Lyrics
A Revolutionary of Rock
A Mover of Spirits
Philanthropist of
a World torn
with Blessings unknown
Taken but not left entirely alone
True to Help someone
in a desperate pinch
That is the Man,
the Symbol of Prince

© Kait King, 2016

Break my heart, why don’t you

Break my heart

Break my heart, why don’t you

I know you didn’t choose to leave

I don’t see you anymore

and it’s hard to believe

you’re not here

with me

now

I can’t hear what you say

your words are in the way

I know what you really mean

It is me

that you

don’t want to be seen

with

Break my heart, why don’t you

you’ve not told me what I want to hear

You’ve spoken to me and for you

it’s crystal

clear

But I keep hanging on

hope makes you all mine

but somewhere in my lonely heart

I know you

will fade

in

time

© Kait King, 2016

The Sea of You

With a pepper spray surprise
you punch the air out of me
The wet fish in the face they talk about
was a coelacanth of ancient emotions
dug from days beyond myself
beyond my soul
beyond what I knew love to be
The fluke of flowers given me
rise like a tidal wave of pungent perfume
swamping me in dizzying, no –
spell-binding and trance-like memories
and the melodies
that remind
me of you

© Kait King, 2015 – Excerpt from My See-Through Mind

god’s puppets

gods puppets

Love stolen

seconds

Sweat laden

moments

Breathing bubble

love

We don’t

own it

Touch tender

minutes

Hand holding

days

Whisperings of

feelings

Love frenzied

craze

© Kait King, 2015

Write, goddammit, write Kait!

Write Kait

Write Kait

Write Kait

Write some more

So I spread my mind

Like the legs of a

whore

Make yourself write, Kait

It’s not at your leisure

Even being forced

could be a hidden pleasure

Type Kait

Type Kait

And type some more

so my fingers

fly over keys

of some succulent score

© Kait King, 2016

Springsong

Springsong

My world breathes

a sigh

and Spring blows

over the rain

Sun bleeds

her way in

I can’t wait

for Summer

again

© Kait King, 2015

Cheater

Cheaters

In a bigamist dual

you fight in your cheating bed

Secret office glances

and secret bathroom head

At home it’s just too boring

you don’t want to fuck your wife

but if she finds out

It will ruin your life

© Kait King, 2015

A broken me

a broken me

Lustful gaze

across a smoky haze

of a darkened bar

incognito

I don’t know

but a broken me

and a broken you

won’t do

I don’t have the strength

to save us both

and you just won’t know

what to do

© Kait King, 2015

I Stand With The Children of the World

I Stand With The Children of the World

Neither here nor there

Neither Here or There

I will never take advantage

of you

here,have mine

I will never take you

for granted

Please, take all of

my time

I will always

give you love

there,

keep my heart

I will always

be here with you

Here is where

we start

© Kait King, 2015

Perseverence

perseverence

Your greatness

waits inside you

Like a volcano’s giant core

And you will surprise everybody, love

They’ll look at you in awe

They will see that passion in you

That light you need to shine

Keep walking the walk you walk, my son

Very soon will come your time

© Kait King, 2015

The Slavering Beast

He could see
and feel
a slavering beast
He could smell it’s
breath
see it’s sharpened
yellow teeth
It wanted him
to do
bad things
It felt like the
Devil with Hate
Not his usual state
of being
but any Angel
with wings
was going to be too late
It said that nobody
nobody
gave
two shits
And do everyone a
favor
Go ahead
slit your wrists

Kait King 2016

Society is Crumbling

Crumbling society

If we don’t talk about it

and share it

We’ll never be aware

of it

Don’t just say something

think nothing

Do it –

It can be humbling

If we don’t change

what’s going on

learn to sing

some other song

things just stay very wrong

Society is crumbling

© Kait King, 2015

Compare and Despair

It’s your specialty
how you play with me
with mind
in motion
and bodies in ecstasy
Charged
Divine
your laugh trapped in time
Secretly, you practice
your lines
A mirror glance
poison flows
those eyes watch with compare
assessing what you
haven’t got
collapsing in despair
And everybody
Knows….

© Kait King, 2015

It’s chilly

it's chilly

Twisted

lying in bed

watching

a moon

wishing

I had you

here

touching skin

to spoon

© Kait King, 2015

No

No

You’ve broken my heart

no,

you’ve ripped it apart

and just left it

over there

shoving it in my face

that you don’t care

no,

that you never did

as a woman

a man

or a kid

no….

you never did

© Kait King, 2015

I let you go

I let you go

I’m torn

my soul says

fly, my love

as high as you can

My heart begs

you to stay

as close as you can

to me

I’m torn

my mind says

you must grow

you must be

I let you go

I let you be

I let you be free

© Kait King, 2016

A Treasured Life

Me n my Dad

My Dad and Me

It was so sad

to watch you fade

your mind

as sharp as a knife

It was so hard

to say goodbye

To such a treasured life

It made me smile

to think on you a while

and on how you loved

your wife

Your children given

all you had

you gave

a treasured life

It seems that you

are still here

although you can’t

be seen

I often talk to you

And not just

in my dreams

I hope I told you

I loved you enough

I hope you know

how much I cared

And I know

one day,

I’ll see you again

Somewhere over there…

© Kait King, 2015