Ashes to ashes
dust to dust
Love won’t last forever
anchored only in lust
Kisses for kisses
I forgive you your past
it’s the only way through
If you want us to last
© Kait King, 2015
Ashes to ashes
dust to dust
Love won’t last forever
anchored only in lust
Kisses for kisses
I forgive you your past
it’s the only way through
If you want us to last
© Kait King, 2015

When you’re hanging by a thread
and the voices in your head
say “just let go”
When you feel torn and down
you try to take a look around
but find
you’re blind
And the time is running out
and you know what it’s about
you can feel that hanging rope
that blade against your throat
and you lean on in….
© Kait King, 2015

The city streets
look oh so sleek
but only when
it rains
Below the glitterati
Porsche
Benz
Maserati
In the parking basement
remain
Below even that
expensive, unreal mat
broken people
who never
have gain
No cash in the casino
No boat in the marina
And no money
to hide
their pain
© Kait King, 2016

I so wish
I could have
been a better mum
But he still loves me
anyway
I see the photo
next to me
Colors blue and grey
you and I
Not much to spend
but time
and he still loves me
anyway
I feel I may have
failed you in
too many ways
to count
In spite of that
you are a beautiful
soul
and you still love me,
anyway
Kait King 16/7/2018

So this is it
I mean nothing to you
I no longer exist in your world
There is no contact number for me
In your cellphone
anymore…
Kait King © 2015

Like I mentioned in a previous post, it’s not easy talking about suicide – especially if you are directly involved on either end of that very sharp stick. I have been on both and a lot of splinters in between. I said it was time to talk about suicide and all of its branches that lead us there and why. And it’s true, but I can’t expect anyone else to be prepared to talk or reach out, even to me, if I don’t do it first. I can’t expect anyone to do something I’m not prepared to do myself. So I’ve put myself out there, so what? I will continue to do so until things change about how we help others and ourselves. Until we find out what more we can do to help each other to understand, identify and prevent so much pain and misunderstanding, we must keep facing the fire and get to know it very well, very very well. Just like we delve into everything else we want to find out about, understand and manage. Why the dark shroud around suicide? It’s time to talk.
Kait King 2020

Tripping
spilling
falling
dropping
words come tumbling out
Hedonistic
realistic
possibly artistic
like chocolate for my mind
are the words from my soul
replete
resplendent
and resonate
to make me feel whole
© Kait King, 2017

The grass squeaks
beneath my feets
Cold steals well into
my bones
Chilly cows in
frosty fields
complain in
mooing moans
The sun is
shining watery bright
glistening drips from
my watery nose
In the shade
of the rock garden
lies a frosty
useless hose
The dogs’ little
paws
hardly leave
a mark
It’s beautiful but
not my favourite time
I have Summer
in my heart
© Kait King, 2016

Howick 2013
When I sing
I feel this thing
all of my body cells
join
the vibration
When my voice
comes out
and I sing of things
I care about
I feel pure elation
When my body
can’t hep but
move
As I sway and sing
the groove
This here,
this is my perfect situation
© Kait King, 2016

Sometimes I
feel like
my Soul is
desperately
trying to
escape…
Tap
Tap
Tapping
at the top
of my skull
“There’s
somewhere
else I’m
supposed to
be
Let me
out!
Set
me
free!”
© Kait King, 2018
02/04/2018
Left of this curve
way in the past
where we made love
that wouldn’t last
I knew then
with that pain in my heart
And I know now
right at the start
© Kait King, 2015
Pre-Occupancy
So nobody’s home
Just cardboard cut-outs
posed in my brain
Memories I can’t let go
Pre-Occupancy
A way to survive
Somehow to numb
the pain
Somehow to stay
the child
Pre-Occupancy
Merely a distraction
Something to hide
any connection
Anything to avoid
taking action
Pre-Occupancy
© Kait King, 2017
She’s beating the
crap out of me
I want to be
retaliatory
But I can’t find a gap
to even try
and hit back
She kicks me in
my side
Everyone there wants to see
me cry
I can hear their
jeering calls
of magnified echoes
charging through halls
This strange metamorphosis
in sound
is my ticket off
the gravelly ground
And I can see myself
lying there
The group of bystanders
shout and cheer
My body, I see
crumpled like
a sack
And I never even got a chance
to throw a punch back
© Kait King, 2015
I’ve been loved
by someone
When I wanted
to be free
And I’ve loved someone
desperately
When clearly
they didn’t
love me
I couldn’t find
a balance
I felt all men
would just hurt me
I made a choice
very purposefully
And I withdrew
from family, friends, and society
Alone
I finally could see clearly
the common denominator
in my failed relationships
was me
© Kait King, 2016

I don’t want to be known
just by an icon on your phone
I want to be recognized
by the color of my eyes
the curve of my smile
Things you’d know when
you’ve known me a while
© Kait King, 2016
The day draws painfully long,
my love
without you in it
The night a torturous silence,
my love
when you are not in my bed
A meal for two,
my love
is now a punch in my gut
and I cannot eat a morsel
thank you,
my love
let me thank you for
a lesson learned
As I never would have believed,
my love
that I would never be
with you
© Kait King, 2017
It’s like
an unsticky web
how things
fall into my
head
Nothing ever
really gets
filtered out
Thoughts are
thrown at me
in a shout
Yeah, it is
pretty clear
something’s going
on here
Each inky
black thought
casting
immeasurable doubt
It even surprises
me
with the words
that I spout
Who wrote
those things?
Evil awful
creepings
Friends ask
Where on Earth
did you find
this out?
Why would
you write such
horrid things?
It gives pause
for thought
and doubt
© Kait King, 2016
They’re staring at me
those doughnut holes
the sprinkles and
that fucking maple syrup glaze
Those different flavoured
cream-filled ones
screaming out my name
They ooze confidence
knowing my desire
my taste buds inflamed
those gooey pink shades
that sticky chocolate shine
that fucking maple syrup glaze
I can’t make up my mind
© Kait King, 2015

Te Kopuru
The Chinese have called this generation of Taiwanese millennials “The Strawberry Generation.” To me, this seems appropriate to most of the world at this time. The Strawberry Generation is so called because they bruise easily, have no resilience, and give up in a heartbeat.
Because everything is so readily available online, whether it be from clothes to sex – you can own it, see it, have it – now, pretty much. I notice that our young people are not used to having patience or having to work for anything because everything is just ‘there’. So, have we created a generation of spoiled brats? Or impatient and uncontrollably angry and frustrated youths? Are these people going to be the adults who have to look after our elderly generation? I don’t mean to cluster everybody into the same box, as this is not fair or true, but I do believe that many of our young people have these attitudes and belief structures about life.
Along with instant gratification, there is also this “throw away mentality,” so we have the availability and the discarding instantaneously, of just about everything. This is now not just the discarding of unwanted objects like clothes or a cell phone, but the discarding of humanity. We throw away so much – even letters that belong in words. But that’s ok – I get it, it’s simpler, quicker, textier….it just feels like the next generation is forgetting how to spell – or never learned, or how to use grammar – capital letters, even. It just seems a little sad…and throw away, and wasteful…and sometimes fucking annoying to try and decipher when I shouldn’t be bothering anyway, but I do try.
I don’t think I would care so much if I wasn’t so into words, language, creating stories or getting a point across. I don’t want to live without words like devotion, loyalty, dignity, grace, honour. Not only that, but I want those words to be relevant in day to day relationships – at home, at work, at play. To operate in the world with dignity, with grace – these things seem not to have been shown to many young women. I want those words returned to us as women, I want them to be a part of how women are described. Not skanks, sluts, bitches, snobs, beeatch and every other name that is used to describe us these days.
And who wants to be loyal to, devoted to, or honor a slag anyway?
Wild animal
– resonate in me
Violent Love
Tender Brutality
Snake, lion,
tiger or sheep
– Passionate,
almost Violent Love,
to: shy,
submissive,
meek
Only 50 shades of grey?
That is what I
want to say
– That Hollywood crap
you can keep…
© Kait King, 2017
Seismic airguns are used to find oil and gas deep underneath the ocean floor. Airguns are so loud that they disturb, injure or kill marine life, harm commercial fisheries, and disrupt coastal economies. These blasts are repeated every ten seconds, 24 hours a day, for days and weeks at a time.
Crazy isn’t it – that money is the most important thing to have…
It’s not even just necessary to live anymore, but needed in excess of a gluttonous, consumable rate. Also, sadly at the expense of every other earthling – plant, mammal, marine, insect life. Ultimately at the expense of our Mother Earth – without whom we wouldn’t exist….But sure, let’s go ahead and blast the oceans, rape and pillage land and sea. Mankind is adventurous and a conqueror! Of what? Ourselves? War seems to already qualify that bizarre question!
Discovery and experimentation for the benefit of survival of all living things is most definitely a necessity, don’t get me wrong. But destroying our only home for the benefit of gaining money is a totally different story. Forward thinking has become about bank accounts when it needs to be about human accountability. Animals adapt to their surroundings, blend in – whereas people force the surroundings to adapt to what they require, causing droughts, floods, contamination.
Humans are the most alien thing to this planet – perhaps we are the ones who don’t belong here…
Kait King 2017

Twisted
I’m finding it hard at times, to write god’s daughter. I have to go to such a dark place and think such dark thoughts that it can be exhausting…and actually put me off writing this story. I don’t know where she has come from, but she won’t leave me alone until I’ve told her story.
Isn’t it a strange way to look at one’s own internal thoughts? I mean, she’s just a made up character, right?! But I feel like I’ve had zero control over where this is going. She is what she is and I’m writing about it. Is she a part of me? Is she always going to be a part of me or will she let me go when I’ve written her out? The longer I delay writing god’s daughter, the longer she will be stalking around in my head. Could she end up taking over? A blemish on the intriguing landscape of my brain. I’m wasting time…I must write…
My See-Through Mind is available on Amazon now! Just click the highlighted link and you will be taken through to Amazon to purchase and/or a preview of the new book (which will cost nothing but you can read a sample and leave a review). I hope you enjoy this unseen work and will let me know what you really think. So a monster big thank you everyone – it’s been another long slog to bring you My See-Through Mind but these are labours of love!
Now I’m getting stuck back into god’s daughter so I’m sure a glimpse will end up on my Monster Maker site, but only a little taste – a bitter pill of someone a little scary…or maybe a lot scary… you can decide 🙂 Personally I’m terrified of her…
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The 3 Little Piggies will be FREE for a limited time – 1 day actually, from September 22nd to September 23rd! Get your copy and be disturbed! Follow the path of a serial killer wrapped in a psychopath. Raw, vital and unputdownable!
Click here for a link to a My See-Through Mind preview. Just click the highlighted link and you will be taken through to Amazon and a preview of the new book (which will cost nothing but you can read a sample and leave a review). It only takes a second to give a star or two, just scroll down or; press the ‘like’ button at the top, so super-easy! 🙂 All help is much appreciated, thank you in advance xoxo
My first reading -Please let me know what you think 🙂 Thanks!