I walk down the aisle
my eyes passing over cards
words springing out
about Mum going
the whole nine yards
And I stop to read a few
The words just seem
insipid
when I think of you,
Mum
A journey into the intrepid
Four babies later
and over 60 years married
Through wars, tonsillitis,
tears and love you tarried
Now, here I am
a mother too
And these words I say: “I love you”
Have also come
from my son’s mouth
and heart
But to say them to you
doesn’t even begin to start
to express what a fantastic Mum you’ve been
You’ve done a good job,
I’m a good human being
So I tell you you’re an amazing Mum
and people are proud
of the job you’ve done!
© Kait King, 2015
Poem
Daily grind of a good guy

I come home
the cat’s at my feet
kids are crying
but there’s nothing made to eat
It’s a hard day at work
with paper knee deep
and the heater’s broken
so I can’t get to sleep
Yet another day comes
we follow like sheep
I can’t find the faith
to make that big leap
I know I shouldn’t take it in
so very, very deep
But it seems to be sort of extra hard
when you aren’t someone who cheats
© Kait King, 2015
Crush

You crush me
Yes, you’re bigger
than me
You’d have to be blind
not to see
that you’re twice the size
of me
But I’m getting tired of
being pushed around
I hate the way you always
bring me down
Slutting yourself all over
this town
And I lie here
so crushed – so deep
underground
© Kait King, 2016
But…

But…
I let you in
Nobody
gets in
You’re supposed to stay
not walk away
I shared
everything –
gave you my all
you were supposed to love me
not push me
and watch
me fall
© Kait King, 2016
Thought # 1

If you’re very rarely or never told “No” or don’t have to wait or work for anything, will it be a harder struggle to get on in the World? (This is based on most normal and reasonable of situations – single or separate parenting included and of course, on a continuum).
In the “Real World” no one else treats you the same way as your parents do. No one else cares the same way for you as your parents do. No one else in the World will give you the same leeway. Will one lack a certain resilience because one can’t deal with a No, or don’t understand why it’s a No?
Your Ego takes a beating, hearing all those ‘yeses’ and how wonderful you are at everything and then a No would just take the wind right out of your sails, it’s a shock. Is it about that resilience? Even against adversity and with all the curve balls life throws you, wouldn’t it be better to be able to face that adversity? I am not talking about being a nagging No Hound about everything – but I do think we need to prepare our children for “out there”! Just tell them the truth, make them stand for something, let them know what their strengths and weaknesses are and let them embrace them all and use them to their best advantage in this crazy Life.
If it is about resilience then we must give our children that strength and fight. They need these things to be able to survive – and not just survive but to live well.
Kait King 2017
Whoever you are
I just want you to know
that you are not alone
I know it sounds empty –
we can’t talk
I can’t hug you
I can’t invite you into my home
But I need you to know
that there is someone out there
someone who also feels the same
is sick of the same game
and shares the same fears
If I can make you understand
this is not what defines you
but the choices you make
from this day forward
even when you don’t know
what to do
© Kait King, 2015
Dark Man

What cruel god
sent you to me
dark hair
dark eyes
dark soul
What fallen angel
turned on me
bitter anger
bitter words
bitter mind
What desperado
begged to be
the embittered mind
and darkened soul
in me
© Kait King, 2015
It’s Just Life

I am lying
on my bed
it’s too hot
and the TV’s
too loud
Yet the noisiest
thing
is you
in my head
I can hear
the washing machine
beeping and
beeping endlessly
WTF is wrong
with those things?!
I know I should
eat something
but
I truly can’t be
bothered
it’s just
food
it’s just
money
it’s just
love
it’s just
life…
© Kait King, 2016
knuckle-bite-fright

warped, crippled
twisted and blackened
my monsters will be set free
decrepit, decayed,
barren of soul
sit here or there
and all will see
Damaged, Dangerous,
Dark and Fright
my monsters travel day or night
bad dreams,
bad thoughts,
dark dreams,
No light –
not all is as it seems
with knuckle-bite fright….
© Kait King, 2015
The first time

The first time
it wasn’t that much
fun
before I got
my panties off
he was already
done…
© Kait King, 2015
This Buzzy Little Feeling

There’s this buzzy
little feeling –
right in the center of me
And although my body is weighted
something in there
has zero gravity
Is that my Troubled Spirit
or could it be my Lonely Soul?
If I caste this bodily feeling
is it my Spirit that makes me
Whole?
© Kait King, 2016
Rock Bottom
I hit rock bottom
I sat on that bottom rock
weeds and roots
tethered me close
and not in a Lovers’ Lock
Catatonic in my despair
broken like a car crash victim
I clutched at straws
and sucked in air
feeling like I needed
Lithium
Overwhelmed by what
I’m not
broken by what I was
fighting what it has to be
a fallen star, a lost cause,
tell it as it is
that old me
will never leave
it’s a part of what makes me
my body may have
let me down
but when I write ,
I’m free
© Kait King, 2015
No Way
There’s just no stopping
a speeding bullet
straight to the heart
With no clanking armour
or a bullet-proof vest
so it rips you apart
There’s just no way
to make it unscathed
through the day
with no love and no hope
no string to cling to
No reason to stay
© Kait King, 2015
Summer Daze
I feel
the sunshine
on my face
through emerald
branches
like delicate
spider-web lace
I feel
the warm
and soothing rays
of those dreamy
summer days
I wish I could
go back
to that place….
© Kait King, 2015
Gasping for Air
Love flutters
like a drowning butterfly,
swallowed up
whole –
Struggling to keep my
head above the
ripples of your heart
Yet still wanting to be
hopelessly – no,
recklessly
flung into those depths
drowning…
drowning…
Kait King
Lucky

Every second we suck in air, a child is hurt or dying somewhere in the world – that makes air a pretty high commodity and a very expensive way to look at breathing our air. Therefore make it worthwhile, make it count, but make it count in love and kindness, caring and passing on joy – not just to children but to all. Breathe your air with purpose, you’re really lucky, every day is a blessing 🙂 Kait King 2016
Lovers lock

Lovers locked
in this bittersweet
ride
Trapped in the momentum
a beat of the heart
Skipping through hope
not a care in the
world
Lovers locked close
just a boy
and a girl
© Kait King, 2015
Another song for Jay

There’s a part of me
that will always go on
I’ve shared this with our Mother Earth
She called him my son
There’s nothing so wild
as the ride that we’re on
mother and child
a bond
we hold on
And there you were
with paintbrush eyelashes
A baby blue blanket
and everything about you was so small
And here you are
with a shy tattoo on you
An eye, ear, lip piercing
And everything about you now is tall
There’s all of you
that makes me smile
When you hug me so big and
hang around for a while
There’s you and me and then
everybody else
I never knew that it would be you
to teach me about myself
© Kait King, 2015
I love you Jay 🙂 xxx
That’s What I’m After

It’s your eyes
It’s your mouth
It’s your smile
your heart
your laughter
But it’s my heart
my fear
It’s my love
my hope
That’s what I’m after
Kait King 2017
I need one of those dogs

Listening quietly
in the dawn
of the day
My mind
playing games
that my heart
won’t play
Watching us still
in the dark
of my mind
waiting for someone
I can’t seem to find
Holding this close
Not wanting to lose
Making the choice
and then having
to choose
As the falling rain
dampens my heart
I can’t seem to see,
Was I blind
from the start?
© Kait King, 2015
Just a moment in Africa

Just before a storm there’s that heavy aching feeling in the sky and electric air. It’s as if the god’s have eaten too much and they have swelled up the sky and filled it with their tautness.
The grasses, trees and shrubs are dead still and almost magnified – waiting – straining and erect for those precious drops of rain to fall upon them so that they too, like the gods, may gorge themselves on welcome water and be able to store up enough supplies to last them through the harder times in between.
I sat just outside to the left of my tent under a tree. I am watching for all the ‘damp animals’ – the one’s who like to frolic and dance amongst the drops as if giving thanks to those glorious gods who have so very kindly provided life support once again.
Gorgeous George is playing with some of the dry leaves that are beginning to stir from being whispered at a little too strongly by the ground winds that slowly pick up as the storm intensifies.
George is my kitten, only not so little anymore – I decided to bring him with me again – I had no idea that he would bring me so much comfort here out in the vast scrubland of Africa.
There is a small lizard; I can see him panting on a flat rock. His breaths are short – he’s sniffing the moist air- totally immobile. George has seen him too and stops fighting his leaf. Slowly he sinks a few centimeters closer to the ground – his eyes almost fully taken up with the expanded pupil. Wriggling furiously he prepares to pounce – still miles away from what he believes is an unknowing lizard. Changing tactics he stalks a little closer. The lizard has seen George now but seems unintimidated. Peering out from under a stalk of whispy grass, 2 out of ten for camouflage George, his whiskers straining, he leaps. His intense energy and passion catapult him well past the intended target which scuttles in between the cracks in the rock unscathed…for now.
Do or Don’t, Can or Can’t

Don’t you leave me
left behind
Don’t you cut me
out of your mind
Can’t you see you’re here all alone?
Can’t you hear your heart say
This is home?
Don’t you hurt me for ever more
Don’t you walk away
and leave it all
You can’t hold me like that
then let me go
There’s something more
that you don’t know…
© Kait King, 2015
Cheers World

There’s a place I like to go
where everyone seems to know
who I am
I like this world
There’s this space I like to be
where everyone I see
is my best friend
in the world
And if I take you there
do you promise not to stare
cos it’s not done like that
in my world
When you walk in the door
and you say she’s just a whore
don’t put her down
it’s not your world
When you stand up at the bar
please don’t brag about your car
We don’t really care
this is our world
And when you do take her home at night
when she squeezes you back tight
Don’t leave her all alone
this is her world
© Kait King, 2015
A Kitchen Bitch’s Bliss

In my kitchen
like a mad scientist
mixing and concocting
a kitchen bitch’s bliss
I stir the witch’s cauldron
a punch of that
a pinch of this
many mouths share muffled mmmm’s
a kitchen bitch’s bliss
© Kait King, 2015
Holiday Plans

You stand there
not knowing what to do
you can’t believe the Police are here
surely this isn’t true?
A blue light spins around the room
you can see the body
shadowed by gloom
It’s all surreal, but what you had to do
If you hadn’t grabbed that knife
the body would be you
You look down at your shaking hands
oddly think about how free you are
to meet
your holiday plans
He can’t really be dead – why haven’t
they called an ambulance?
And again, you realize …
that you are here…
just by chance
© Kait King, 2016
Good Poetry

Good poetry is knowing when to stop the rhyme
Whether it’s two or two hundred
and twenty-two lines
© Kait King, 2015
A lighter model….

I didn’t die
I’ve just upgraded ….
© Kait King, 2015
Crush

You crush me
Yes, you’re bigger than me
You’d have to be blind not to see
that you’re twice the size of me
But I’m getting tired of being pushed around
I hate the way you always bring me down
Slutting yourself all over this town
And I lie here so crushed – so deep underground
© Kait King, 2016
After the Fact
He rolled her up
in the carpet
He tied her up
real tight
He threw her into
the trunk of
his car
And screeched out
into the night
He knows he must not
draw attention
He must slow down his breath
and calm
He drove around
for hours
With her body
in the back of
his car
Delusional or clear
of mind
It really didn’t
matter
He was clear enough
to clean up
the mess
And removed
all of her blood
he splattered
He contemplated water
He thought about the dump
He thought about a mountain top
He could make it look like
she jumped
As dawn approached,
a screaming light
His stomach started
to rumble
So he drove her through
the drive thru
And didn’t miss a beat
or fumble
A steady hand
held out dollar bills
But his eyes he kept downcast
Not a thought spared for
his wife in the trunk
The love that didn’t last
© Kait King, 2015
If you want to

I have a notion
that your emotion
is not just a session
of dark depression
but a mark on your heart
like a bite from a shark
missing pieces never found
and this is why you’ve gone to ground
I can guess
you don’t see this as a test
but an evil calculation
to distract you from your destination
A calculated move
to jig you outta your groove
But the world is not against you
just try on the other shoe
it’s not that hard to do
and if you walk a decent mile
you might cry but you might smile
ain’t it worth it in the end
if you find you’re your best friend
So don’t knock yourself so hard
you’re not stupid or a retard
We are all given different gifts
And as we live our outlook shifts
from continental rifts
to continental drifts
we figure it’s not just about ourselves
that there are no Christmas elves
and that you need to really care
for everything
if you want to get along here
© Kait King, 2015
But I’ve already paid!

With some leftover tea
I chuck some painkillers at me
A certain kind of guilt and
a definitive disgust wash over me
I fight every day
to keep a smile on my face
being strong, overcome
I have a new life to embrace
I know this is not what
I signed up for
I’ve paid the full price
for so much more
But I guess some you win
and some you lose
So I experience my life
in a different pair of shoes
But I’m still so sure
I was destined for so much more
so much more
I’ve already paid for
© Kait King, 2015
University Sleep

It’s time for me to close my eyes
the sleep – she calls me in
tempting me with promises
of dreams from deep within
Happy to drown in fluid darkness
my lungs relaxed and full
spiralling soft, my body jumps
but still I feel the pull
And so I slumber deep and long
my dreams are all but lost
as I pull myself up from this sleep
to be chilled by morning’s frost
My bed, it lies like a crumpled body
it’s death, by noose, my sheets
I pull on my jeans, headphones on
and head into the streets
The bus stop frozen from icy glares
the wind a second best
We glide and jerk through glistening streets
I know I’m not a guest
My homework lies upon my lap
I want to turn around and go back home
Even my music has lost it’s colour
and bleeds into a drone
We fall out of the bus in an untidy crowd
the Subway reeks of cheese
I feel broken and somewhat heavy
Would they notice if I fell on my knees
My iPod turns into my lecturer
and continues in a monotonous tone
My brain has surpassed this walled in campus
I fall back into my cool dream zone
My liveliness is so inspired by friends of sweet love and sweet dreams
this shining light of laughing free
and left splitting at the seams
We say adiós and walk away
our paths cross again tomorrow
I find myself doubting myself
is this the path that I should follow?
I stand in the queue, the bus pulls up
we file in like a production line
stamped and paid and sit if you’re lucky
the sun’s shining and every thing’s fine
I walk briskly home, it’s getting dark
I walk in tune with a song
And wonder at ideologies like…
why can’t we all get along?
It’s warmer inside and my little friend
turns himself inside out to see me
I talk, I eat, I study hard just to go back
to be soft, warm and dreamy
© Kait King, 2015
You’ll say to me

I’m uncomfortably present
awkwardly, I’m here
Cleverly, you’ve trapped me
by playing on my fear
I don’t want to say yes
but something in me is sparked
and if I don’t say yes
I won’t have a heart
you’ll say to me
You’ll say to me
I don’t really love you
that I’m not really into it
and my love is not true
And yet that twist inside me
coils like a snake
ready to make me feel bad
making me ready to hate
myself
© Kait King, 2015
Trust me

Meet me in the middle
and I’ll take you to the end
Tell me that you trust me
and I’ll let you be my friend
Promise me the world
and it’ll fall at your feet
Run the faster race
’cause it’s me you have to beat
Don’t believe in rumours
and they won’t control your life
Believe in what you want to be
and step into that light
© Kait King, 2015
Re-thought

When standing here
with you
I don’t know what to do
or who to be
A lost and broken
man
Holding out his
hands
I don’t know
where to turn
I was swept up by
you
Crushed and broken, too
now I don’t know who I am…
© Kait King, 2015
Beauty Boundless

Jay and George
Beauty Boundless
child of mine
with hopeful heart
and fascinated mind
Beauty Boundless
land of mine
filled with color
seen by the blind
Beauty Boundless
spirit of mine
where love will rest
till the end of time
© Kait King, 2015
When I Sing

Howick 2013
When I sing
I feel this thing
all of my body cells
join
the vibration
When my voice
comes out
and I sing of things
I care about
I feel pure elation
When my body
can’t hep but
move
As I sway and sing
the groove
This here,
this is my perfect situation
© Kait King, 2016
The YouTube Monster Awakens ;)
My first reading -Please let me know what you think 🙂 Thanks!

